Azalea Trevelyan, Inquisitor
by emeraldeye14
Summary: The story of how Azalea Trevelyan, mage of the Ostwick Circle, came to leave her circle and join the Conclave.
1. Of When Her World Fell Apart

Chapter 1: Of When Her World Fell Apart

It was evening when her entire world was destroyed. The sun had only just set over the horizon and Azalea Trevalyn, Ostwick Circle mage, was reclining in a couch in the library, a hot tea in nursed in her lap, looking out the large floor-to-ceiling windows and admiring her view. This was her favourite time of day, a time she always took for herself, to relax, reflect, and just unwind. Not that her life at the circle was particularly taxing, in fact she loved it there. Whenever she visited her family, always accompanied by two or three templars of course, she was always left longing to get back. Recently her family had started wanting her to marry, nevermind how such a thing is rather more complicated within the circle for anyone to really want to marry. But it was for political reasons, not convenience, and the last time she had visited there had been no less than four eligible young men who just happened to be stopping by for her to meet. She was interested in none of them. In truth, her heart belonged to another, though there was no way she could ever tell her family as such. Derrek was a templar here at the circle and was often assigned to her personal guard. She made the templars nervous, she knew that. They were nervous around all mages of course, but Azalea had control over more magic than most. It sang to her; she understood it in an innate way that was beyond most mages, especially one as young as her.

Last night though... Azalea smiled with the memory. Last night Derrek and sneaked into her room. Up until then they had shared nothing more some flirting that made those around them smile but otherwise ignore, a chaste kiss or two whenever they could find some time alone with each other. But last night she had told him she would set up wards around her room that would prevent her neighbours from hearing anything, if only he could prevent his fellow templars from patrolling this particular corridor and being able to sense it. Derrek, for his part, had ensured that he alone would be on patrol in this corridor, giving them several hours to enjoy each other. That had been the best night of her life. She didn't know if she loved him, but she had loved his body and he had loved hers. It was her first time and she still felt the warm glow in the pit of her stomach as she daydreamed about it.

Azalea smiled into her cup as she took a drink. Afraid that people might talk if they spent too long together, after last night she has spent most of today either in the library studying - anatomy and how magic affected it was her current interest - or in the infirmary helping out the healers there where she could. In truth though, she really didn't mind spending her time in that way. Of course she would have liked to speak to Derrek more, but she was accepting that their relation would have to be a secret. And she truly enjoyed researching and learning and practicing her skills to help others. If magic was created to serve mankind what better use for her time was there?

A few of her teachers disagreed though. There had been talks, in private of course, of the mage rebellion that was sweeping the country. The Feraldan circle had been first, and then the Kirkwall circle, quickly followed by others, the mages rebelling against unfair treatment from the templars and the prison like experience of the circles. Azalea had been invited to a few of those talks but for the most part she only listened, saying little. So far at least, Ostwick Circle remained neutral, something Azalea was particularly grateful for. She knew that some circles were horrible places to live, where the mages were treated little better than prisoners or slaves, that the templars abused the power they had over them, but it wasn't like that at the Ostwick circle. Oh, sure, there were cases of things getting out of hand, of fights breaking out, especially with new templars wanting to prove themselves and mages who had been forced to go to the circle against their will, but for the most part they were few and far between. While it was rare for templars and mages to associate they mostly existed in harmony, the templars protecting the mages not only from themselves especially during a harrowing, but sometimes also assisting in experiments. There were some experiments where a mage was at a greater risk of possession especially when they involved investigations into the fade. There were always templars at hand willing to watch on to prevent a disaster from occurring in such cases. They also helped the people of Ostwick as well, and, while Azalea had always required a guard whenever she left the circle to visit friends and family, they were always polite and courteous when escorting her.

Which was why, when three templars burst through the door to the library, swords drawn, it took Azalea a moment to accept what was going on. Had something happened? Did they need help with a mage who had been possessed? She sensed a lot of magic being used, but nothing particularly malicious that would suggest a possession. Swinging her legs over the couch to stand, she was about to put her cup of tea aside and ask what the problem was when she was hit in the chest with an invisible force that had her stumbling backwards, knees hitting the couch and forcing her to sit once more, the tea falling from numb fingers to shatter on the stone floor. She managed to gasp in two breaths as the templars approached her and it was only now that she noticed their swords were bloody. They had killed already tonight. Fearing what they meant to do Azalea attempted to reach for her magic but found only nothingness. Gritting her teeth and pushing herself forward to stand once more, even moving forward a few steps, she gathered all of her control and a blast spread outwards from her, breaking the hold the templars had. The templars before her were young, not as skilled at their magic hindering abilities as some of the veterans at the circle which was the only reason her attempt had succeeded. They were stunned long enough for Azalea to cast an ice trap at their feet, locking them in place. She had no desire to truly hurt them, surely this was just a misunderstanding that the First Enchanter and the Knight Commander could work out. Hearing shouts, she ran from the room, ignoring the furious shouts of the templars trapped in place.

The room she ran into was one of the classrooms used to teach acolytes. Azalea herself had spent many hours in this room before her harrowing studying and trying to understand everything she could, devouring whatever information her teachers presented her with. Now though, the acolytes were cowering beneath their desks, all children of about ten or twelve years old. The bodies of three children were already in bloody puddles in the doorway, the templars stepping over them, dismissing them like trash.

"Azalea, here!"

Azalea caught the staff that the class's teacher, Richar, threw to her. The elf was standing between the templars and the other children, attempting to prevent the templars from continuing their slaughter. Azalea stood beside him and quickly cast a barrier spell over them. The elf seemed surprised that she still had access to her magic, but not nearly as surprised as the templars before them.

"Azalea, stand down!" one of them ordered, and Azalea felt her heart leap with recognition. It was Derrek. He was wearing a helmet that obscured his face, but she would recognise that voice anywhere.

Stepping forward, though keeping her hold on the staff light and low, trying to be as non-threatening as possible, she said, "Derrek, what is going on here? Why are you attacking everyone, and innocent children at that?"

"The Rite of Annulment has been authorized. The children are not innocent but blood mages in training. As are you all," Derrek said before launching his own dispelling attack. Unfortunately, Derrek was a lot more experienced than the templars in the library and the punch-in-the-gut sensation of Azalea's connection to the fade and her magic being cut off was a lot stronger and more forceful.

Recovering quickly but this time not bothering to attempt to break the hold, knowing it wouldn't work, Azalea rose the staff defensively before her. "No," she said firmly. "I can't let you do this. It's not right. Kill the mages if you will, but leave the acolytes alone." It was foolish really, but a part of her believed that Derrek would listen to her, would, if not call off the attack entirely, at least use reason.

"No," Derrek said, his voice a growl, his eyes, visible through the visor of his helmet, dark with hate. He rose his sword. Azalea saw it coming down towards her and instinctively continued trying to reach for her magic, to throw up a barrier once more, not really believing that Derrek would kill her, not after last night.

The sword kept descending towards her though and it was almost too late that she realized that he wasn't going to stop, that he meant to kill her, to cleave his sword right through her head. Frantically, she pulled backwards, raising her staff defensively to try to divert the attack. It almost worked; the sword didn't slice through her skull but it did cut her face. A sharp burning pain over her eyebrow, her vision going red as blood flowed into her eye and Azalea stumbled backwards. She was given no time to recover though before an armoured foot slammed into her chest. Aided with the templar's magic she flew through the air, slamming forcefully into the stone wall, the back of her head connecting with the stone with an audible crunch before the world went dark.


	2. And Now We Are Apostates

_Blood. Blood everywhere. Pooled on the ground. Splattered on the walls. Dead staring eyes, the eyes of children. Sometimes. Sometimes it was adults. Sometimes it was impossible to tell, the bodies hacked apart, a hand here, half a head there. Her mouth was open slightly, she could taste the blood that pooled around her. And the smell. The smell of dead bodies, the reek of bowles that had let go, of intestines split open and spilling their contents and, over it all, the tangy metalic scent of drying blood. Blood. Blood everywhere._

Azalea woke with a gasp that quickly descended into a groan, a hand raising to her head. There were bandages there, and it hurt. Blinking, she tried to bring the world into focus as a face appeared before her, blurry, bloodied with a large gash over his face hastily stitched closed, but familiar. Richar. One corner of his mouth, the side that hadn't been sliced open, lifted in a small smile. "Glad to see you're awake," he said, his voice quiet. "We weren't sure if you would for a while."

"You look... Worse than I do," Azalea said, her voice croaky. Her body ached and she was sure she was covered in bruises, but apart from her head she didn't believe she was injured. Hearing the raspiness of her voice, Richar handed a water flask to her.

"Just a little, we don't have much," he said, and Azalea did as he requested, sipping a little of the stale water, swirling it around her mouth and swallowing before handing it back.

"Where are we? How... How did we get out?" she asked as she looked around. There were a few other mages around, a half dozen or so, and four acolytes, all of them injured but all of them alive.

"We're in a cave, somewhere south of Ostwick. After you were knocked out, I got the children to run and held off the templars as long as I could. This had just happened," he waved a hand over his face, "when a dagger opened the templar's throat. There was an elf there I didn't recognise, not a mage, who was fighting the templars alone. He killed them, including Derrek."

Hearing that, Azalea bit her lip and nodded slightly. It was expected, of course if she were alive then Derrek would have had to have died or he never would have stopped until all the mages under his care were killed. But it still hurt. "Was it quick, at least?" she asked. She knew that he didn't deserve a quick death, that he had murdered three students and who knew how many others, but the part that had, if not loved at least been very fond of him didn't want him to suffer.

Richar nodded. "It was. He went the same was as the others, the dagger across the throat so fast it could barely be seen. The elf then spoke in an Antivan accent, he said 'Stay alive, I'll be back once they are dead.' and he left. I did what I could for you when I saw you were still alive, as well as for Sarah, one of my students who was too frightened to run. The elf came back after the sounds of fighting had ended and made sure we got out alright. Thank the Maker the templars had waited until sunset to attack, it was dark by the time we fled and we got out unseen."

"Where's the elf now? I should thank him," Azalea said.

"Gone," Richar replied. "He left as soon as we were safely out of Ostwick. It was a 'happy accident. Or perhaps not so happy accent for those dead,' he said," Richar said, his voice imitating the Antivan accent almost perfectly.

Azalea sighed and closed her eyes, her hand resting on her forehead. "And so now we are apostates," she said, her voice pained. It was not something she had ever thought she would be. She enjoyed living in the circle and, for all its faults, believed it was a good system. The templars had always protected them and she had felt safe around them. Until now anyway.

"Now we're apostates," Richar repeated quietly. "We've decided that the best course of action will be to head south to the Temple of Sacred Ashes, to the Conclave there. Will you join us? Your noble birth could be beneficial, reassuring them that we aren't all blood mages and elves," he said with that same half smile. Richar and Azalea had gone through their training together, though Richar was a few years older than Azalea. The Daelish had always considered himself lucky. In some clans, he said, if a child was born with magic when there were already enough mages for the clan they could be killed. Others would send them to nearby clans who have less mages, or perhaps just abandon them completely. Richar had been sent to the circle instead when there were no other clans nearby who needed him. He had chafed under the circle restrictions more than Azalea had, but had never made any kind of move against them, understanding the need for such things in place. It was just bad luck, he said, to be born a mage _and_ an elf.

"I don't have much of a choice," Azalea said quietly. "If I return home, I'll just bring danger to my family. Provided they even take me back after what's happened. Or I can strike out on my own, but a lone mage is guaranteed to be taken for true apostate or blood mage and killed." She shook her head. "No, I'll come with you. Maybe I can speak reason to this heated discussion, proof that not all circles were abusive all the time."

"Thank you," Richar said and Azalea was surprised to see the relief written on his face; she didn't think it would mean that much to him.

"I've always wanted to make a pilgrimage to the Temple of Sacred Ashes," she added with a half smile.

Richar gave a snort at that. "Well now you'll get to see it up close and personal. Get some rest. We'll be moving in a few hours."


	3. Glances

Azalea was sitting on the stone wall on the outskirts of Haven, her back to the wooden palisade as she watched the soldiers train. And one particular commander training them. The sight was something to behold especially to the Circle raised girl who had until recently never left Ostwick. She wasn't as sheltered as some of the circle girls, she had had sex before. Once. And she wasn't sure if she had even loved the man. Oh she had been fond of him and trusted him, but love? In truth she didn't really know what love was and she hadn't had the chance to find out. He had tried to kill her before they had the chance. Remembering that made Azalea grimace in distaste. She had mourned Derrek and what could have been, she had had two months to do so, but it still hurt and made her look at all templars in a new light. Even this Commander Cullen, who she had barely spoken two words to so far. She could not deny how he attracted her - tall, blonde, muscled physic, and she couldn't deny that part of the attraction was his templar abilities - but it was also all of that that scared her. Azalea sighed. She would think that she had had enough of running to templars after what they had done.

Pushing away from the wall she landed with a soft thud, the powder-like snow coming to her ankles. She smiled at the sight, snow still being something of a novelty to her. Oh she could create ice on a whim, she was quite talented with ice spells, or so First Enchanter Lydia had said while she was tutoring Azalea. But it was one thing to understand the theory enough to create ice, it was another thing entirely to see it falling down from the sky naturally. It coated the mountainous landscape around them and, were it not for the green-hued breach in the sky, the sight would be simply spectacular.

Deciding she should make herself useful rather than sitting around daydreaming, Azalea started off towards the trees, picking elf root as she went. The plant was common enough but was used in so many healing recipes in so many different ways that they never seemed to have enough of it. There was to be a council meeting later today where they would discuss the ongoing mage and templar war and a possible lead of someone who may be willing to help them, but Azalea had time yet. She wouldn't stray too far, of course, but there was plenty to find just in and around Haven.

It was perhaps an hour later that she made her way back to town. Cullen was still training the troops and a part of her longed to go up and talk to him, to strike up a conversation. But then what would they talk about? Azalea had never been the kind of woman who was good at holding idle conversation and even if she was, she got the feeling such a thing would only annoy the commander, especially while he was busy training the troops. With a sigh she walked past without saying anything, intent on giving the elfroot she had gathered to Adan.

Cullen watched the mage as she first left Haven and then came back once more carrying a bag of something. She was... Interesting. He had had Lelliana's agents look into her background and what they had found was different to what he had expected. Being that she was with the rebelling mages' delegation he fully expected her to be either from one of the circles that had had troubles of that nature in the past, Kirkwall or Feralden perhaps, or at the very least to have been a trouble maker. But she was neither of those things. Rather the reports he had received seemed to indicate that she enjoyed living at the Circle. She rarely petitioned to leave, and when she did it was only to visit family on name days or religious celebrations, always observed the chant of light, and was the Ostwick's First Enchanter's apprentice while she had been learning. She didn't have so much as a sneaking out of the dormitory at night infraction against her name. However, Lelliana's agents hadn't been able to establish what had caused the Templars to enact the rite of annulment against the Ostwick circle, nor how she and her fellow mages had escaped and wound up with the rebels. And now, it was likely that the only person who knew was Azalea herself since all her comrades had died at the conclave and she wasn't particularly forthcoming in talking about herself.

"Shield up!" Cullen called out, as much to cover his own wandering mind as to remind the soldier to protect himself.

They had a meeting later today and Cullen couldn't help but wonder how Azalea would react to it. Of course, being a mage, he was sure that she would be more sympathetic to their cause, but at the same time, she had avoided the few mages at Haven, even talking to Minaeve very little and only regarding research of the rams and druffalo they had killed for their meat and leather. Cullen shook his head and ran a hand through his hair, frustrated.

"Sir?" his lieutenant asked, puzzled by his commander's actions.

"Get me a practice sword," he commanded.

Untying his cloak and tossing it aside, he took the offered sword saying, "Take over Lieutenant," before moving around the tents to where he could hear a distinctly female voice grunting with exertion. For a moment or two he watched as Cassandra fought the dummy before her. She was good, but then he didn't expect anything less; seekers went through similar training to templars after all.

"Care to fight something that will hit back?" he offered.

Cassandra paused in her fighting and looked up, a half smile on her lips. Her inclining head and the action of raising her weapon into a ready position was acquiescence enough so Cullen moved in. Unlike Cassandra, he hadn't yet warmed up so to begin with they took it easy. When both could tell he was warmed up enough the speed picked up, as did the ferocity of the attacks and the strength of their defence. For a while they merely spared in silence, both enjoying the rhythm of the combat and taking advantage of the clear head it required. Cullen hadn't spoken much to Cassandra recently but he knew she felt the loss of the Divine and their current situation just as strongly as he did, perhaps even more so being that she had interacted with her a lot more.

Eventually though, Cullen broke the silence. "Our mage Herald, what do you think of her? Do you think the Maker sent her?" he asked, parrying one of her strikes.

"That is two different questions," Cassandra said, striking out once more, low this time. Cullen darted away as she continued. "Yes, I believe the Maker sent her. Do I believe that was Andraste behind her in the Fade? I don't know. I do not think it matters. She is what we needed when we needed it." Their dance of swords continued for a little while Cassandra gathered her thoughts. "As for what I think of her, it is hard to say, she hasn't been particularly open. But she has been willing to help from the start, even more so when she learned that she could help, that her mark would close the rifts. That, to me, is more important than whether I like her personally or not. Why do you ask?"

Cullen swung high and Cassandra dodged easily, her sword flicking out almost contemptuously in response. "She is more important to the inquisition than she acts. I wanted to know if I needed to have her watched, if she could be trusted. She did arrive with the rebel mages after all."

"As opposed to the rebel templars?" Cassandra countered, both in words and in swords. "I don't believe you have anything to worry about there. She wants to help, she sees the importance of closing the breach, that is what is important. Now are you going to fight me or continue gossiping?"

Cullen smiled at the teasing and renewed his efforts once more, this time in silence.


	4. Nightmares

Azalea awoke with a gasp, her body coated in a cold sweat, still seeing the phantoms in the dark crowding around her. _It was a dream. It was just a dream,_ her rational mind kept repeating like its own prayer but, despite that, she couldn't get the images out of her mind. Throwing back the covers she stood and paced around the room, a hand gesture lighting the torches and lamps as she went, bathing the one roomed cabin she called her own in light. It would get easier, logic said it would. After all, soldiers killed all the time and if they were wracked with nightmares every night then they would be tired all the time and end up getting killed themselves.

It wasn't enough. She felt trapped in her room, trapped in a way that she hadn't since Cassandra had captured her believing her to have killed the Divine. Throwing on a pair of pants and a loose shirt, not even bothering with a breast band or in tying up her hair, Azalea left the cabin. She was immediately struck by the cold - there was a biting wind and it was snowing again - but instead of causing her to retreat back inside, it seemed to revitalize her. For a moment or two she simply stood there, eyes closed, face turned up, feeling the wind whip through her clothing as though she were naked. She could very well be, she had forgotten to pull on boots. Instead of going back inside to get some though, she turned and trudged barefoot up the hill towards the chantry, the painful cold helping to keep her grounded. Haven was practically deserted at this time of night, well past midnight. There were only a few campfires around with some soldiers sitting by them. Most only spared her a passing glance before going back to whatever they were doing. Azalea didn't even spare them that. She was focussed entirely on the icy sensations whipping her body and getting to the chantry. It was all in her head, she knew, but she could have sworn that the wind had changed to icy fingers stroking her cheek and she was grateful to open the large wooden doors to the Chantry and slip inside.

It was still cold inside, but, to Azalea's cold skin, it felt almost painfully warm and her feet were stinging as they carried her across the red carpet towards the large statue of Andraste. She took a seat in front of the statue and brought her legs up to her chest, wrapping her arms around them. History had taught her that Haven used to be inhabited by cultists who believed that a dragon was Andraste, until the Hero of Feralden had driven them away and found the Urn of Sacred Ashes. Azalea wondered if the Hero of Ferelden had ever felt as she did now, lost, like she was a fraud and soon everyone would be able to tell, haunted by those she had killed. Hugging her knees tighter, Azalea stared up at the serene statue before her, the statue of who she was supposed to be a herald for. How? How was she supposed to be a goddess's avatar? The Maker had never spoken to her, nor had Andraste. She couldn't remember what had happened in the breach; surely if she was saved by Andraste it would be something she would remember. And surely Andraste would not have supported in her killing others who just happened to believe different things to what she did.

"Trevelyan?"

Azalea started at the voice and looked over her shoulder. It was Commander Cullen. Feeling a blush rise at being caught so she turned back to the statue before her, hoping he would leave. Part of her was nervous at being alone and unarmed around another templar. She didn't think Cullen was the type to hate mages on principal and want to destroy her, if only because she was useful to the inquisition, but then she didn't think Derrek would try to kill her the very night after they had shared a bed together either. It just proved how terrible she was at reading people.

She heard footsteps approach and hunched her shoulders, as though trying to hide from the commander. Without a staff she had no defence against him should he try anything but maybe-

Azalea flinched when Cullen rested a hand on her shoulder, but nothing more came of it, no deadening of her magic, no force, no attack.

"Maker, you're freezing! Your toes are blue," he said. Azalea glanced at her feet. That her toes were blue was a bit of an exaggeration but her toe nails were definitely a bruised blue colour. She gave an uncaring shrug but the commander unpinned his cloak and wrapped it around her shoulders. Instinctively, she tugged it about herself. It smelled of him, she realized with a touch of embarrassment, a kind of masculine tang, leather, and over it all that unique spice of lyrium that all templars smelled like. Cullen had moved around in front of her and had knelt down, cupping one of her feet in both his hands, rubbing to get some warmth into them. "What's possessed you to come out so late, and without any shoes for Maker's sake?" he asked.

Azalea considered saying nothing, she had to keep up the façade, she knew that, she had to appear in control, sure of her actions. Meeting with Mother Giselle had proved that to her. Even though she wasn't the leader of the Inquisition, if anyone was it was Cassandra in Azalea's mind, people still looked up to her for guidance as the Herald. Commander Cullen was the leader of all their military forces, if he saw her as weak it would leak into all their forces and that would be the end of it. But, looking up a little and seeing what looked to her like genuine concern in his eyes, made her reconsider. Who else would understand better than him? He had been in Circles, he knew how sheltered some of the mages in them were. He also had to keep up appearances for the moral of the troops he led. And he no doubt had gone through the killing for the first time thing.

"Nightmares," she eventually said, though she looked down, still feeling somewhat ashamed to have had to admit it.

The commander gave a grunt. "That is something I know all too well," he said, his voice deep. He let go of the foot he had been rubbing, letting it rest on his knee as he took the other one and began rubbing it as well. It hurt at first, as sudden heat to a cold limb always did, but it soon felt good as well. And the warm comfort of his cloak was also something that she found made her feel safe. Like how templars used to make her feel, safe, warm, and protected to carry out her research in peace. "Do you want to talk about it? I understand if you don't but sometimes speaking it aloud can make it seem less real."

"Do you talk about yours?" she asked.

"Sometimes," he said. "Usually just to myself, or in prayer though." Satisfied that her feet were warm once again, he returned them to where they had been on the pew and flicked his cloak over them before sitting down next to her.

"I kept seeing the... Faces of those I had killed yesterday. Pointing and accusing at me. And their families mourning and blaming me and blaming the inquisition. I had tried to keep track of them, tried to at least count them so I could light candles for them when I returned, but I couldn't, there were too many," Azalea said, her throat constricting at the last and she lowered her forehead to her knees, hiding her face and her shame.

There was silence for a minute or so, but when Cullen spoke, there was a touch of surprise in his voice. "Have you never killed anyone before yesterday?" he asked.

Azalea shook her head.

"Not even when you left the circle?"

She shook her head again. "In the circle I used ice to lock their feet in place and ran, and when my magic was severed I used a staff to deflect any attacks but I was knocked out fairly quickly. And yesterday..." She hugged her knees tighter to her chest, still not looking up even as the words poured out of her. "For the most part I tried to support those who were with me, I cast barrier spells and ice traps and things that made it easier for them to do the killing. But then I got separated from the others, they were fighting some templars, but mages came up behind us. I tried telling them not to fight us, to stand down, that the inquisition could give them something worth fighting for, but it was as though they didn't hear me and they attacked. The others were too far away to help in time and I couldn't just be defensive, I would tire too quickly. I had to attack and my normal immobilizing tactics wouldn't work because they would just continue attacking me from where they stood. I... I froze them, and they shattered. Bloody icy shards going everywhere. And it was easy. It was done, threat gone and I could focus on helping my friends again. I told myself that I would remember how I had killed those three men, I would light a candle and let their families know if I could. But there was so much fighting going on, no one was willing to listen, and I killed more and more and I lost count. I try to remember some, but there must be some I've forgotten, and what crueller thing is there, than to simply forget who you have stolen the life from?" Azalea stopped suddenly, her throat catching. At some point the commander had put his arm around her shoulders and his thumb was moving up and down, trying to comfort her.

"I'm sorry," he said quietly. "I wish I could say that it will get better, but it won't. Just know that you did the right thing, you did what you had to do."

"How can you say that? I've _killed_ people, their life is over, they have no chance now to atone for what they may have done, no chance to say goodbye to loved ones, no chance to make the world better."

"You're right," he said. "They cannot do any more. But it also means they won't do any more harm. Had they lived, they might have done better. But they might have made everything worse as well. We can't know. What we do know is what we're presented with, an attacking, unreasonable force trying to harm those we hold dear. And so we defend them in whatever way we can. They are doing the same. It is the way of war Trevelyan, surely you would know that from your brothers at least."

"It's one thing to know the theory of it. It's another thing entirely to be on one side, killing the other," she said quietly.

The commander gave a bark of laughter. "That is is," he said.

They sat in silence for a time, Azalea thinking over what the commander told her. It was true, she knew that. If she hadn't killed those people she didn't know what they may have done. But more than that, she would have tired even faster and then been unable to protect those who were with her.

"Do the others know?" Cullen asked into the silence.

Azalea raised her face, resting her chin this time on her knees, staring at the statue of Andraste. "Varrik suspects," she said. "I think he could tell something was wrong, he asked if I was alright and then kept looking at me funny after I assured him I was fine. I don't think Cassandra or Solas noticed, or if they did they didn't care. One more thing to worry about in a world gone mad. You won't tell them will you? About this or any of it?" she asked, turning her head to the side to see him, suddenly worried he would do just that.

He wasn't looking at her though as he shook his head. "I wont mention it if you don't want me to."

"Thank you," she said, returning her gaze to the statue.

Once more they lapsed into silence. Azalea allowed herself to breath slowly and deeply, filling her lungs until they felt as though they were bursting, then letting it out slowly. Such breathing exercises had always relaxed her and calmed her mind while in the circle, it was a wonder she hadn't thought to use it before now. She could feel herself growing tired but, not wanting to make the trek back to her cabin, she simply rested her forehead on her knees and closed her eyes, intending to meditate a little, certainly not intending to fall asleep, leaning against the commander as she did.

Cullen glanced sideways when he felt Trevelyan lean against him and was only mildly surprised to find she had fallen asleep. Instead of waking her though, he let her stay where she was for now and merely returned to his own thoughts. This was the first time they had spoken for any length of time and part of him was glad that they had even if he wasn't glad about the circumstances that had brought it about. He felt as though he had gotten to know Trevelyan a lot more just through this talk than he could have by reading Lelliana's dry impersonal reports. She seemed a lot more like a person with all the hopes and fears that went along with it rather than a know-it-all mage who happened to have a unique mark on her hand. He was beginning to see that the distance she kept from everyone was her way of dealing with what was happening.

They sat there for an hour or so, with the sun just peaking up over the mountains and the candles on the altar burning low before Cullen thought to move. He didn't want to wake Trevelyan though, nor take her out into the snow once more. Instead he gently lifted her and carried her to his own room. It wasn't like he would be getting any more sleep tonight anyway. Leaving his cloak around her, he added a blanket and left her to sleep, closing the door quietly behind him. Once outside though and without any chance of waking her he started pacing.

What Trevelyan had said was unexpected; all of them had assumed she would have no problems in the Hinterlands, both physically able to defend herself - which she did naturally - but also with killing those who needed to. It seemed they were wrong on at least one part of that. They had assumed that she had killed before, that she would be able to handle it. But it seemed that all their assumptions had caused this very problem. They had assumed and not asked. And Cullen blamed himself more than any one else. He should have known, should have guessed. She came from a noble family, she never had to fight to survive, and as soon as her powers manifested she was sent to a Circle, and a peaceful one at that. He knew that most mages lived a sheltered life, very few even aware of what was going on in the world around them, let alone partake in any of it. With a few exceptions, circles were often worlds of their own, completely apart from the rest of society. He knew this, and yet it never occurred to him to think that perhaps Trevelyan was unready for what the Hinterlands offered.

By their reports when they returned though, it seemed they had done well. The crossroads were secure, Trevelyan had spoken with Mother Giselle who genuinely seemed willing to help them get the chantry off their backs, and they were well on their way to securing horses for the Inquisition. But that only meant that Trevelyan had pushed what she was feeling aside until she felt safe enough to feel it, obviously when they all returned to Haven. He would have to alert Lelliana and Josephine to this, quietly of course, and see if they couldn't come up with a way for her to get used to taking such charge and the effects that it would bring in a gentler way. Perhaps dealing with the mages and templars would be best. They needed at least one of them, preferably both on their side to have any hope in closing the breach, maybe dealing with them would be a good way to harden Trevelyan, get her used to the demands that would be needed of her. At the very least, if this attempt was successful, she was one of the most powerful living mages and, as a key member of the inquisition, would have a strong say in how to move forward with the mages. She had to be ready for that and not let it break her. And he would ensure that she was ready.


	5. Mages

Azalea entered her home with a sigh and, walking across the floor she kicked one toe to the opposite heal and pulled off a boot before taking a step and doing the same to the other boot, leaving them both where they were. She lent her staff against the wall and then she was at her bed. With a groan she flopped face down on it, legs half hanging over the edge, just smelling the musty blanket smell she had started to associate with home. The last mission had been... hell, and she was sure that there would be a whole new round of nightmares to torment her sleep.

She did get to see Val Rouyeax for the first time though, she remembered with a smile. The city had been spectacular! All these lords and ladies walking about in the highest of fashion, all wearing fancy masks and head dresses making Azalea and her party look positively drab by comparison in their travel-dirtied battle armour. And the architecture itself! All white shining buildings, but not the dirty white of Ostwick buildings, everything was gleaming and clean and trimmed in gold and crimson and beautiful! Azalea had the normal Free Marshes pride, she loved her homeland and the independence with which the Free Marshes governed themselves, but she had never before felt more of a country bumpkin out to the big city for a faire for the first time and it made her feel as though her homeland truly was backwards and, well, quaint.

Their time in Val Rouyeax had been of mixed success. While they had gone there with the intent to at least talk to the Chantry, to try to make a few of them at least doubt what the common stance was, to believe that perhaps they were doing the right thing, instead the templars had shown their true colours, attacked the Mother who was addressing them, and stormed off, abandoning Val Rouyeax to its fate. That was hard to understand, it was so against what most templars believed in, but at least Azalea had had some experience with templars acting against what they were supposed to in Ostwick; it seemed like a much larger blow for Cassandra.

On the upside, they had managed to recruit two more followers, one in particular with whom Azalea knew of at least by name, if not in person. Her mentor, First Enchanter Lydia, had mentioned her a time or two as a friend. Lady Vivienne was a mage to be respected and Azalea fully intended to seek her out later, to ask if she knew what had happened to Lydia; she hadn't been with the mages who had escaped the tower. Azalea suspected the woman was dead, but she didn't know for certain and figured that if anyone was to know it would be her friend Vivienne. Later though. Now she just wanted to rest.

Azalea had been fully ready to follow the templars to find out what was going on with Lord Seeker Lucius and to try to convince them to join the Inquisition. After all, mages needed templars, it had always been so, who better to protect against possession than one immune to magic? And they would be ideal for weakening the breach enough for Azalea to try again to close it. But that all changed when she went to Redcliff to meet First Enchanter Fiona. What was going on there... Azalea shuddered. She couldn't just leave and ignore it. Not if what that Tevinter mage Dorian had said was true. Time magic! Such a thing should be well into the realms of impossibility. But more worrying to Azalea was that the Tevinters had gained control of all the rebel mages and seemed to be planning something sinister with them. That had to be dealt with first, she could try to reason with the templars afterwards if she could but such magic couldn't be allowed to run rampant.

So she had chosen to focus her attention on the mages first. And been sent forward in time.

Azalea's mind instinctively shied away from those memories. They were not pleasant, seeing how her friends had been captured, tortured, red lyrium changing their very being.

But, with Dorian's help, they had succeeded in being sent back to their normal time and in stopping Magister Alexius from doing any more harm, as well as bring the mages in to help with the breach, albeit as prisoners rather than allies. Dorian hadn't like that, said it was repeating history, but Azalea didn't know what else to do; the rebel mages had taken over Redcliff after the conclave, turning out the inhabitants to the tender mercies of any bandits that decided to take what they could. There had to be some kind of repercussion, that was obvious and Azalea had taken the lead of Queen Anora. The queen had had far more experience in leading and making fast decisions than Azalea had and she was clearly not happy with what had happened by the fact that she wanted to banish the mages from her lands altogether. There had to be some kind of justice and conscripting the mages to the inquisition was the best that Azalea could come up with at the time. Was it the right thing? She didn't know. Hopefully it would be enough but only time would tell.


	6. Leaving

"You expect us to surrender and kneel. We will not. You'll face us all. When we choose!"

Azalea turned to the side and kicked the trebuchet into motion. Her action surprised Corypheus enough that he was distracted from her, following the arch of the boulder as it rose and then fell into the mountain, sending an avalanche of snow and ice rumbling down the mountain. The sound was incredible and she could feel the vibration through her feet as it drew ever closer, the roar growing louder and louder until it was all she could hear. She turned and ran. It was hopeless, a silly instinct to try to outrun such a force, but it was that instinct that likely saved her life as she tripped but, instead of slamming into the ground as expected, she fell through a mine shaft she didn't know was there, falling, falling, then slam into the ground and the world went dark.

Sometime later, Azalea had no way of knowing how long, she became aware of her surroundings once more, and aware of the pain radiating throughout her body, ribs, head, arm, hand, it all hurt. But pain meant that she was alive. She was alive when she was supposed to have been dead. Slowly, an arm cradling her tender ribs, she rose to a sitting position and looked around. She was in some kind of cavern, though natural or man made she didn't know. The doorway in front of her was definitely not natural but it was old. Climbing unsteadily to her feet she figured it would be better to follow it, either up to the surface or down to the Deep Roads, than stay here and freeze to death. As she was approaching the archway though she caught movement out of the corner of her eye. Azalea spun towards it, wincing as the sudden movement sent a lance of pain through her chest and dreading yet another confrontation.

"Meow."

Azalea almost laughed at herself hearing that and she knelt down. "Hey little guy," she said quietly. "What are you doing out here?" She held a hand out and a small furry paw poked out from under the piles of broken wood.

"Are you stuck?" How a cat had gotten down here she had no idea, but there was no way she could just leave it behind when Haven was destroyed. She pulled the shards of wood away, slowly revealing orange, black, and white fur. There was a little bit of blood on its hip but it didn't seem too bad and, as soon as it was freed it stood and walked without assistance. Right towards Azalea.

"I guess you and I better try and find a way out of here, huh," she said. Picking up the cat she put her (she checked) down the front of her top. It was the warmest place for both of them she decided, and the cat seemed to like it, purring as she stuck her head out through the neck of her armour.

Climbing to her feet once more, Azalea slowly made her way through the tunnels. She had no idea where she was going or if the tunnel would ever lead out, but moving was preferable to staying still. She knew from the flare that had gone up that Cullen managed to get the people out of Haven, thank the Maker, so at least that part was successful even if the dragon had carried Corypheus away before the avalanche had swallowed him. She supposed defeating someone who claimed to be a god wouldn't be that easy but it was still a disappointment. "Just focus on the now," she told herself quietly. There was no point worrying about what might have been when she may yet not survive the coming hours.

Rounding a corner Azalea felt hope surge in seeing an exit to the tunnels. "There," she said to herself as she hastened towards it. Coming towards another cavern though she skidded to a halt. Demons. A lot of them. And her staff had been lost in the battle with Corypheus. She took a step back, and then another, but it was too late, they had seen her, and with a screech they launched their own attack. Azalea hastily threw up a barrier and was about to ready an ice trap before her when her hand flared with pain. Gasping, she looked at it bewildered; it hadn't hurt since they managed to close the breach, well except when Corypheus had tried to remove it from her. It didn't make sense that it would hurt now. But then as she watched, she could see the magic around it was being sucked into it, she could almost hear the singing as it did so. An idea forming, she flicked her hand forward the same way she used when she would close a rift. To her amazement it worked: a green glow formed in the centre of the cavern and, with a screech all the demons were sucked into it before it disappeared.

"Well. That's useful," she said to herself. The cat stuck her head out of her shirt again - she had hidden at the first sign of danger - and Azalea gave her a few pats before continuing on.

She could see the exit now and hurried towards it as fast as her battered body could move. Outside she was hit with a blast of icy wind that stole the breath from her lungs. The cat, after flicking her ears back, tucked her head back inside Azalea's shirt. Azalea looked around and, finding a destroyed wagon, made towards it. There was nothing else to see, the world was white and the air freezing. She had to keep moving though, she knew from her studies the effects cold and ice had on one's body, if she didn't keep moving she would have no chance.

Seeing a trail of debris she decided she should follow that. Likely it was from the escapees in Haven and maybe, just maybe, she would be able to catch up to them if she continued moving as quickly as her sore and battered body would allow. The cat against her stomach was a welcome source of heat and, as she waded through the snow, she held one arm against it to keep her more secure there and try to help ward off some of the cold.

"We have to go back!" Cullen demanded, his fist slamming down on the table with emphasis.

"There is no way she could have survived that," Josephine countered wearily.

"And even if she did, how would we find her? The whole town has been buried under half a mountain of snow and ice," Lelliana added.

"We have mages, let them melt through it! That being, Corypheus or whatever his name was, is gone, now is our chance!" Cullen said.

"Suppose we did waste a whole lot of time and effort in melting the snow over an entire town, dig out thousands of bodies and actually find hers, what then? It will achieve nothing," Lelliana snapped.

"Commander, I think we all need to accept that Trevelyan was very brave and gave her life to give us a chance. We shouldn't waste that opportunity in searching for a body, she wouldn't want that," Josephine said, trying to bring some calm to the whole situation.

The same argument had been going around and around in circles every few hours, every time they stopped for a rest, Cullen would demand that they turn back to look for any sign of the Herald, and the others would convince him it was a wasted effort. Now night had fallen and the mountains were bitterly cold. It was likely they would lose a few more people and mounts tonight just from the cold, though they had made their camp where they had some shelter from the never ending wind. Cullen couldn't stand the thought that Trevelyan might be out there, alone and hurt somewhere, needing help, and the rest of the inquisition was willing to just abandon her. After all she had done for them and given up for them! It was unfortunate they said. Well damn the Maker if Cullen was going to put up with it any longer!

Without another word he pushed away from the table and entered his own tent, coming out wearing his thickets coat.

"Commander? What are you doing?" Josephine asked. As if she didn't already know.

"I'm going to go find her. You can all sit on your hands here if you want but I'm won't be able to sleep at night without at least trying. She is the only one who can close the rifts, without her there is no point. She has to be alive out there somewhere," he said, his voice impassioned though whether it was to convince them or himself he didn't know.

Azalea was shivering violently now, her breath coming in ragged gasps, each time sending shards of pain down her throat. It was only the knowledge that if she stopped walking she would die that forced her to put one foot in front of the other. She had to keep moving. Sometimes it helped to imagine horrors were right behind her and, sadly, such images were easy to conjure up. All she had to do was remember the red lyrium infected templars who had attacked Haven, imagine them popping up from the snow and chasing her down. Or, sometimes perhaps, even Corypheus himself and his dragon hot on her tail. Or cold. Very cold. It was so very cold.

She couldn't feel her hands or her face any more, and she had long since stopped feeling her feet. Her feet were just lumps of meat now that she lifted and placed, something to keep her upright. The little ball of warmth at her stomach was growing colder as well but she knew her stomach was the warmest place for the poor cat.

One step.

Another step.

Another step.

Left step.

Right step.

Left step.

Right. Or was it left? She couldn't remember any more, she just knew she had to keep moving.

Vaguely she wondered what Cullen was doing. She smiled a little at the knowledge that at least he had gotten away. She didn't know what it was about him, but she felt that she could trust him. He inspired such trust and fellowship from the men and even Bull had acknowledged that it took real skill to train a group of people into an army, skill that Cullen had. But Derrek had been skilled too. Oh Derrek. Could she have seen his betrayal coming? Was it possible for her to have guessed it if she wasn't too busy thinking of having sex with him whenever she could next arrange it? They say men are blinded by their cock but Azalea was convinced she had done a pretty good male impersonation in that regard when it came to Derrek. He hadn't even shown any remorse or guilt in trying to kill her. She couldn't see his whole face but, as if time slowed down, she could see his eyes, those grey eyes she had once thought were deep but now she could only think they were cold. Not like Cullen's. Cullen had eyes the colour of honey, warm and sweet, just like he was.

Like she was getting. She was warm. How had that happened? At some point she had stopped shivering, though she couldn't remember when.

It didn't matter, she just had to keep moving. She was daydreaming about Cullen again. About how he had kept her warm in the chantry when she was plagued by nightmares, how he had supported her decision regarding the mages even when so many others didn't. How he had looked at her when she said what she was going to do, when she didn't answer about how she would get out after burying Corypheus. It had been with respect, understanding, some sadness yes but it was the respect that had stuck with her. When she first met him she was sure that he didn't like her, that he didn't trust her. To have earned that respect, the respect of a man who was himself highly respectable, was something she was grateful for.

If she looked up she could even see him before her. She smiled. The cold really was getting to her now. She knew that, once she stopped shivering, she would fall asleep soon and never wake up. It was one of the things she had had to be careful about in the Circle, playing with ice magic. She could see him, running towards her as if to rescue her. Her knight in shining armour. She scoffed at the notion, even as her legs finally gave out from under her. She thought he said something, but she couldn't hear it beyond the roaring in her ears and soon it didn't matter anyway as darkness fell and she knew no more.


	7. Warmth

"Maker, she's turning blue," Cullen said as he pulled Trevalyan towards him, hugging her body towards his trying to get some heat into her. She was unconscious now, but she had been walking, or rather stumbling, towards them when he first spotted her. If he hadn't insisted on coming out here to find her... Well, that didn't bare thinking about.

"I'll go get a bed ready for her," Cassandra said, turning and running back to the camp while Cullen lifted the freezing mage and started a slower walk back. He could see a commotion start up as Cassandra arrived at the camp; people were made aware that they had found their Herald, that she was in a bad way and needed help. It was a mark of how many people she had likely unknowingly affected that nearly everyone was rushing around to get things ready and to try to help her however they could.

"Hold on, Trevalyan, hold on," Cullen murmured as he hurried as fast as he could through the thick snow back to camp. By the time he arrived the others had organized a camp tent for her. Outside Dorian was heating flasks of water with his fire magic and passing them to Cassandra, who carried them inside, no doubt adding them to the bed to prewarm it.

They attracted a lot of stares as Cullen carried Trevelyan through the campsite, and most of them were stares of worry, though a number also held amazement in their expressions. Here was their Herald, the one who had risked all for them to escape, faced down a monster alone, been buried by an avalanche, and was still here for them, even if she was so frozen as to be near death. In truth, it was starting to make a believer out of Cullen as well. There were just too many coincidences and while he was willing to believe that it was coincidence that had given Trevelyan the mark and got her out of the Fade, it was getting harder and harder to believe that coincidence was all it was when she, a Circle-sheltered mage, perhaps the most unprepared person imaginable for the task, succeeded time and again. And here she was again, alive, barely three hundred meters behind them. Now they just had to get her warm and tend to whatever injuries she had from her ill-fated fight with Corypheus and maybe, just maybe, they could at least get through this latest setback.

Entering the tent Cullen was hit by a wave of heat. It was as though there were a bubble around the tent trapping the heat within it, which he supposed could very well have been the case as Solas was there with a magical fire flickering in the centre of the room that gave off heat but no smoke. "Here," Cassandra said, pulling back the blankets and furs that covered a camp bed. Cullen laid her down on it and, covering her, started rubbing her limbs, trying to get some warmth back into them.

Dorian came in then, carrying a teapot in one hand and a cup in another. The teapot glowed slightly as Dorian heated it with magic then poured some steaming tea into the cup and passed it over to Cullen. "Sit her up and try to get this into her," he said. He sniffed then and his nose twitched. Rubbing it, he sniffed again, then let off no less than six sneezes in a row.

"Don't tell me you're getting sick now," Cassandra said, raising an eye brow at him.

Dorian rubbed his nose again, eyes now streaming. "Is there a cat in here?" he asked, looking around, eyes narrowed suspiciously.

"A cat?" Cassandra repeated.

Cullen had been ignoring them until now, more focussed on manoeuvring Trevelyan into reclining against him so that he could wrap his cloak around her and keep her warm while trying to get her to drink the tea to warm her from the inside out. But as though hearing Dorian ask about a cat, there was a sudden movement inside Trevelyan's shirt and a furry head popped out of her neck.

"I knew it!" Dorian declared. "Get that thing out of here, would you?"

"It must have been keeping her warm," Solas said from where he sat minding the fire. "Probably what kept her alive this long."

"The cat stays," Cullen said, putting the cup aside briefly to lift the cat out of Trevelyan's shirt, doing his best not to touch her inappropriately, and putting it on her lap.

"Then I go," Dorian said. "Call me if you need me, and when that cat is gone," he said as he left, another three sneezes escaping as he did so.

The cat seemed quite content to sit in amongst the furs on Trevelyan's lap, its claws rhythmically coming in and out as it purred and kneaded away. Cullen ignored it in favour of trying to coax Trevelyan to drink. He managed to get two cups into her, her throat instinctively swallowing what he slowly tipped into her mouth, before a hand rose and clumsily swatted the cup away, spilling what was left of it everywhere.

"She must be coming around slightly," Cassandra said from where she was kneeling at the foot of the bed, rubbing Trevelyan's feet. With a grunt of disgust she added, "She will be lucky if she doesn't lose any toes. Solas, are you able to heal them?"

"Not if the flesh is already dead," he said, but he stood to have a look. Cullen couldn't see what her feet looked like from where he sat, but he saw a shining blue light come from where his hands hovered over her feet. After the light died out, he said, "Her blood should flow more easily now. She has other injuries too, likely from the fight with Corypheus, or from the avalanche itself. Broken ribs and a badly sprained wrist most notably. I can't heal that but I can help with the pain when she wakens. Adan will likely be able to strap them so they heal best as well."

"I'll send him in once she wakes up," Cassandra said. Standing, she covered Trevelyan's feet back up with the blankets and furs. "Why don't you get some rest. I'll watch her for a few hours, then you can take over. I think she should have someone she knows and trusts nearby when she wakes up."

Cullen nodded and gently, carefully, returned Trevelyan to a lying position, pulling the covers up over her, high over her neck and over the cat as well who didn't seem to mind in the least. For a moment he simply stared at her face. Her cheeks were pink now and, while her lips were still a little blue, they had a lot more colour in them than before. Softly he reached out and brushed a lock of hair from her face, then sighed and straightened. "Call me as soon as she wakes up," he said before he left the tent, Solas trailing behind him. How he was supposed to sleep he had no idea, but he would try, if only so he could be awake and with Trevelyan when she eventually woke.

_Corypheus lifted her in the air, his mouth moving, saying words, but she couldn't understand him. It hurt, her hand felt like it was burning, like it was being torn at from the inside out, like it was five times as big and roughly, brutally stretched that way._

"Trevelyan, it's alright, calm down."

_She heard a voice, words, but she couldn't string the words together, couldn't make them make sense. The voice was wrong though, it was coming out of Corypheus's mouth but it wasn't his voice. It was wrong, it was all wrong._

"It's just me. Calm down, you're having a nightmare. It's not real, wake up."

_The words came from Corypheus's mouth again, but they were still wrong. Something about a nightmare? It was a nightmare, everything was going wrong, by choosing the mages she had abandoned the templars to be infected with red lyrium, they were killing hundreds, all her fault. And Corypheus was speaking again. He swung her, she held helpless in his grasp. She flew through the air, right towards the trebuchet._

Azalea screamed as her arm flung wide. It was caught, but it wasn't the harsh claws of Coryphus that held her, but warm, calloused hands. Her eyes flew open but what she saw wasn't what she expected. She expected... What? What had happened? "Where am I?" she asked, her voice sounding panicked even to her ears.

"You're with the Inquisition, in camp. It's alright, you're safe now," a voice said. A gentle, familiar voice. It was tinged with worry, but it was comforting too. A face slowly came into focus, a familiar face.

"Cullen," she breathed, relaxing a little.

He smiled, relief plain on his face. "Yes, I'm here," he said. "We found you in the snow, freezing. But you're safe now."

He reached out, using a cloth to gently wipe away the fear sweat that was on her brow. Azalea closed her eyes at his touch, though they opened once more when the cloth was brought away. She reached out and took hold of his wrist, stilling it's movement. "Please, just... just hold me. Only for a little while," she said.

Cullen's eyes widened in surprise at the request, but he put the cloth aside and gently took her in his arms, letting her rest against his chest. She felt so small in his arms, so frail, and Solas had said she was injured as well. He held her lightly, careful not to hurt her further, but she seemed not to notice any pain, her eyes drifting closed and a hand grasping the shirt he wore. She was asleep again, so quickly, but at least this time it seemed to be a natural sleep.

The tent opened then and Bull ducked in, his head held low in the tent, his sword drawn. "We heard a scream," he said.

"It's alright. Was just a nightmare," Cullen said, a little colour rising to his neck at being caught holding the Herald like this.

Bull, never missing anything, gave a cheeky grin. "I'm sure you'll do a good job comforting her," he said.

Cullen scowled a little at that, but said only, "Could you please send Adan in? She's injured and he should be able to help."

Bull nodded and left the tent, and, thank the Maker, he did so without waking Trevelyan up again. She needed rest and sleep, they all did really, but her most of all. And if holding her close meant she could get it and the nightmares would stay away, well that was what he would do, all night if required.


	8. More Bad News

Azalea tilted her head back, marvelling at the play of sunlight through the leaves, the effect leaving speckled light and shadows on her upturned face. She was sitting in the gardens at Skyhold just resting. The journey here had been gruelling, their supplies low, basically whatever they were carrying when the people of Haven escaped through the Chantry tunnels, being forced to leave those who died on the way behind and not spend the time to cremate them properly. Azalea herself had had her own trouble in keeping up with the pace they were forced to keep. The first day she had to be carried, she was still too weak to walk but after that she had insisted on making her own way. And then, to reach the top of the rise and see Skyhold off in the distance. Well. There was nothing more fantastical that Azalea could imagine. Seeing Skyhold was like an overwhelming sense of relief. This was somewhere they could make their home, make their stand. Cullen had assured them that it was built to be defensible and Josephine had said that the damage that weather had wrought could be repaired for the most part.

Azalea was taking the time she could to relax and rest some more. Her wrist had healed and only twinged when she lifted something heavy with it, but her ribs still hurt if she coughed or moved too suddenly. But it wasn't just physical healing she craved but mental as well, a chance to come to terms with how much her life had changed and how fast. She had gone from circle mage, to apostate, to prisoner, to Herald of Andraste, to the Inquisitor, leader of the Inquisition. When Lelliana had handed her the sword, Cassandra telling her that they had all decided, without her mind, that she was best suited to lead the Inquisition, Azalea had wanted nothing more than to run and hide at that, she had felt as though her stomach was going to launch up into her throat, that she would throw up and shame herself in front of all those people gathered. She had never seen so many people gathered in one place and staring up at her before and the whole experience had been terrifying. She had gone through the motions like a dream, play acting at being a confident leader who believed she was capable of not only saving them all but defeating Corypheus. The truth was quite the opposite. But she couldn't let that side show. Vivienne was right, deeds only went so far, people believed what they saw and they had to see someone who was confident and capable.

"Inquisitor?"

Azalea resisted the urge to sigh hearing Lady Vivienne's voice. She opened her eyes and forced a smile to her face.

"I thought you might like some tea," Vivienne said. "I added some elfroot to yours."

"Thank you," Azalea said, accepting the offered cup with a more genuine smile this time.

Taking a seat beside her on the stone seat, Vivienne said, "I wanted to make sure you were alright, my dear. You made a very hasty retreat just now."

Azalea grimaced at that and took a sip of the tea. The elfroot made it a little more bitter than Azalea liked, but she had grown used to the taste over the last few days. "You noticed that, huh," she said, a little annoyed with herself. She thought she had managed not to make it look like she was running away but if Vivienne was here asking about it, she had obviously not been particularly successful.

"I did yes, but I doubt those who don't know you as well would have noticed so have no fear of that."

"Yes, I just... had to get away. It was all becoming too much." Azalea sighed. "I know I can't run from it, don't worry about that. And I'll do all I can to make things right. If nothing else what I saw in the future makes me know I have to succeed, the consequences of failure is too terrible," she said staring into her tea, watching the steam curl ever upwards.

"I'm glad you see that, my dear," Vivienne said. "It is paramount that we use this time to plan and prepare to move against Corypheus. And all of Thedas must see us do it." The woman was silent for a while and both of them simply drank their tea and watched Azalea's new cat play in the garden and hunt the insects that buzzed around. She had named her Enasal, which was an elven word Solas had recommended that meant joyful relief, or the sense of joy felt at overcoming obstacles. Considering how Azalea had found the cat it seemed appropriate.

"You were one of Lydia's apprentices at the Circle, were you not?" Vivienne asked into the silence.

Azalea nodded. "She was like a second mother to me, more of a mother than my actual mother in many respects. Why do you ask?"

"I believe I can see what she could in you, my dear. You may not have the confidence in yourself, but you have the ability whether you see it or not. You have friends and you can rely on them, but in the end it is you who people associate with the Inquisition and it is you who shall steer history. You need to trust yourself; if you didn't have it in you to be what you have become, Lydia would never have taken you as her apprentice," Vivienne said.

"Thank you," Azalea said with a smile. Vivienne had become somewhat of a mentor since she had joined the Inquisition, she reminded her of First Enchanter Lydia. In some respects it was a comfort but in many more it was an uncomfortable push into the terrifying unknown. "Do you... You don't perhaps happen to know what happened to her? She wasn't with the mages that escaped the Circle with me which makes me think she's likely dead but... Well, it's one thing to suspect and another to know."

"You never heard?" Vivienne asked, surprise clear in her voice.

"No. Should I have?"

Vivienne was silent for a moment then said, "No, perhaps not. Follow me, I'll give you the letter I received."

Standing, the two women left the gardens together and climbed the stairs to the mezzanine level Vivienne had turned into her own. Vivienne dug around in her desk drawers for a little bit before pulling out a letter. "Here," she said, handing over the letter. "Why don't you take that up to your own quarters to read, my dear."

Azalea nodded and took the letter. "Thank you. I'll return it when I'm done," she said.

"Oh whenever you're ready, my dear. There is no rush."

Azalea nodded again and rose a hand in farewell as she made her way downstairs. The fact that Vivienne was telling her to read it in private already told Azalea that the letter contained bad news. The letter felt heavy in her hands, like lead, as she crossed the great hall and slipped past the door to her new quarters. Despite the obvious bad news waiting to be read in her hand, Azalea couldn't help but smile a little as she climbed the stairs to her room. If nothing else, being the Inquisitor certainly did come with some fantastic perks. The room was bigger than any she had ever lived in previously even from before she went to the circle. Not to mention the views! She had had views in her room at the Circle, but they were nothing like the beautiful snowy mountains that she had here.

Sitting on the divan by the stairs, Azalea took a deep breath to steady herself and unfolded the letter. The writing was not in a familiar hand but it was written in an official tone.

Cullen was supposed to be going over the notifications to be sent to the families of those they lost in Haven but, as important as he knew that work to be, he couldn't focus on it. His mind kept on wandering. Or rather wandering to one particular woman. It was nothing more than silly fantasizing - she was the inquisitor now, perhaps the most powerful woman in Thedas in the absence of a Divine - but he couldn't seem to help himself.

"Ugh!" he said, a wordless grunt of frustration to match the wordless feelings he was experiencing.

Pushing the papers away, feeling guilty but knowing he wouldn't get any work done for now anyway, he strode out onto the battlements, intending to take a walk to cool his head and... other places. It was cold out here and he pulled his cloak tighter around him. It reminded him of the night they had escaped from Haven. And the fear he had felt when he thought that they might never find Trevelyan. Even after they found her and she was so cold and she hadn't woken by the time he had rested and came in to check on her.

Running a hand through his hair, he just kept walking, not really paying any attention to where he was going. Perhaps he should have been surprised when he wound up standing outside the front of Trevelyan's door but knew that the only way he could get her out of his head so he could focus on his work was if he could see her. Maybe he could pretend he was checking on how she was healing, or invite her to a game of chess or something.

Climbing the stairs, he called out to announce himself, "Inquisitor, are you in? I -" He broke off when he thought he heard something from the room above his head. Crying?

Reaching the top stair, he looked around to see Trevelyan hastily wiping an arm over her face. "What is it with you and always seeing me when I'm at my worst?" she said, refusing to look at him.

"Just lucky, I guess," he said with a small smile. Coming around and sitting on the seat next to her, he said, "What's wrong?"

Instead of answering though, she just handed him a piece of paper, a letter, and stood, walking out onto the balcony that overlooked Skyhold's courtyard. Cullen stayed where he was and looked at the letter, reading it quickly. It was addressed to Mistress Vivienne and included lines of special titles and salutations which Cullen quickly skipped over.

_It is with regret that we write to inform you of the death of your friend and confidant First Enchanter Lydia. In refusing to side with the rebelling mages and wishing to keep Ostwick Circle neutral, she was unfortunately attacked and killed by mages under her care who were unhappy with this decision. It is because of this act of rebellion that the Knight Commander Roderik invoked the Rite of Annulment against the Ostwick Circle._

There were more details, a list of others killed, both templars and mages but remembering that Trevelyan had been the First Enchanter's apprentice he figured that was what she was upset over. "I'm going to kill Vivienne for thrusting this on you now when you already have enough on your plate," Cullen declared angrily, standing up to go do just that, but was stopped when Trevellyan spoke from the balcony.

"No, I asked her for it. Well, not the letter as such, but if she knew what had happened to Lydia. They were friends so I thought she might know." He heard her sniff and she leaned against the balcony, looking out. Cullen started to join her there before he changed his mind, instead leaning against the doorway. "I mean, part of me knew she was dead. When the templars attacked us and a few of us escaped she wasn't with us. The templars were even killing the children, the wouldn't have spared the First Enchanter if she hadn't escaped. But I guess a part of me hoped that somehow she had escaped with another group, that she never made it to the conclave, that she was alive somewhere and we could convince her to join the Inquisition. She would have, you know. The Inquisition is more concerned with returning peace and stability to Thedas, which was why she kept the Ostwick Circle neutral; she didn't want to add more fuel to the flames."

"You were close to her, weren't you?" Cullen said.

Trevelyan nodded. "She was more of a mother and family to me than my real family. When I first came to the circle I was afraid of what my magic could do. It manifested... Heh. It manifested when I got angry at a servant. I set her dress on fire. She was alright," Trevelyan was quick to add. "I helped her put the flames out once I got over the shock of what had happened. But then my father sent me to the Circle, without even having time to pack. I was so afraid of my magic, afraid I would accidentally hurt someone. The first day there, I spent the whole time hiding in my closet so I wouldn't have to go to classes." Cullen couldn't help but smile at that. In some ways it was hard to imagine their Inquisitor so afraid of the magic that came so naturally to her that she would hide in a cupboard, but another part of him knew that she was a deeply caring woman, that she hated to hurt others so in other ways it made perfect sense. "Lydia found me there. For the first three days, she moved me into her rooms, so I didn't have to see any of the other apprentices or anything. She had me do things like carry a burning candle around, and ice blocks, and tend to fire places. And at the end of each day she would explain how magic was like that candle, or that ice block, or that fire place. It had a use, it made it easier for people to work, or it kept drinks cold. Sometimes it would hurt the person using it, it might burn, but if precautions were taken and the user was careful, the benefits far outweigh the risks."

In truth, Cullen wasn't sure he agreed with that, but regardless even he could see that it was the right thing to say to a girl afraid of her own magic, a fear that would very quickly lead to a possession if she didn't get over it. "She sounds like a very reasonable woman," he said.

"She was," Trevelyan agreed. She sighed and turned slightly so she could look at Cullen. Her blue eyes were red, but clear. "'Magic is meant to serve man, not rule over him.' I know a lot of mages cite that line, but she really believed it, and she taught me to believe it as well. In the Circle it was easy. I could help in the infirmary, share my research findings, even help teach a class or two. Serving man was restricted to the people in the Circle for the most part. Here..." She turned back to look out over the court yard. "There are so many of them, and they're all relying on me to do the impossible."

"There are a lot of people looking to you," he said. Pushing away from the door frame, he moved to stand next to the Inquisitor, leaning against the stone railing as well. "But you're not alone. I know you have to keep up the façade of control and confidence, but you don't have to keep that up all the time. You can let the barriers down around those you trust. Around me."

"I know, and thank you, really," she said. She smiled at him, and Cullen could have sworn his heart had just done back flips to see that. She was a pretty woman, somewhat prim and proper with her hair always braided up tightly and out of the way, but when she smiled she was stunning, beautiful. Cullen nodded, and the two of them returned their gazes out over their courtyard, comfortable just sharing in each other's company.


	9. To Cheat

"Care for a game?"

Azalea looked up from the letter she was reading to see Dorian standing before her, one hand on his hip. She smiled. "I could do with the distraction. Though I have to warn you, I'm not very good."

Dorian laughed and offered her a hand to help her stand, which Azalea took solely because he was being charming and not because she needed the help. "That's alright, I fully expected to win anyway. Not many people can beat the Fabulous Dorian!"

"Alright then, Sir Fabulous Dorian, let's play," Azalea said.

The two of them set up on a stone table in the gardens and played a few games largely in silence at first. As Azalea had warned, she lost every single one and usually fairly quickly too. Planning ahead with these kinds of games wasn't really one of her strong points and it wasn't seen as overly important in the Circle either. She wasn't a commander to be leading armies, to strategize how a battle might go and how best to take advantage of what may happen. Of course, her training hadn't really readied her for leading the Inquisition either, but thankfully she had Cullen to lean on for that side of things.

"Oh come now, you're not even trying," Dorian complained when he took her game piece yet again. And if she wasn't mistaken it was probably the exact same way he had taken it in their last game.

"Sorry, I'm a little distracted," Azalea admitted.

"A particular commander hmm?"

"How did you - No," Azalea spluttered. "No, I received a letter from my family today. It seems they want to visit. Here, at Skyhold."

"Now if it were my father wanting to come here, that would be a problem, being big scary Tevinter mages, but Trevelyans from the Free Marches? Why is that an issue?" He moved a piece.

"If it were just family members that would be annoying but not really problematic. But, while the letter doesn't explicitly say, I can guarantee that it won't be." She moved a piece, which was almost immediately seized by Dorian's. "My last nameday I got permission from the Circle to attend a party my family threw for me and-"

"You had to have permission to celebrate your nameday?" Dorian asked, an perfectly formed eyebrow rising.

Azalea nodded. "It's no big deal. I don't know of permission ever being denied, not for something like that. It's more of a formality so that the Knight Commander can assign a couple of templars to accompany you. And before you say anything about them being guards, they mostly kept their distance. They were just on hand in case anything happened, especially if you're still an apprentice."

"Mmm," was all Dorian said to the matter.

Azalea knew she wouldn't be able to convince the Tevinter mage that such things weren't as big a deal as they seemed so she didn't even bother. "Anyway, they threw this huge party for my name day which is terrifying enough as it is, but then they must have invited every single unmarried man under forty and insisted that I meet all of them and dance with at least half of them. And then after the party was over my mother wanted to discuss them all with me." Azalea sighed, though whether it was at the memory of that night or the fact that Dorian had stolen yet another of her pieces it was unclear. "They've been trying to get me to marry since I turned sixteen and so far I've rebuffed every attempt by pointing out that it's difficult for Circle mages to get permission to marry. If they did then they would be expected to move away from the control of the Circle. I probably could have gotten permission, being the only Trevelyan daughter, but I didn't want them to know that. Ugh, I lose again."

"And you're afraid that they'll try it again if you allow them to visit?" Dorian guessed as he reset the board.

"Yes. Especially now that the Circles are abolished. That party was the last I saw of them, and I cut my visit short, eager to return to the peace of the Circle."

"So refuse them."

Azalea shook her head. "I wanted to. I said as much to Josephine when she gave me the letter, but she warned me that such a public rebuff could put a lot of the northern nobles off-side. I have to accept." She made her first move, unaware that it was the third time she had made the same opening move. Now it was just something to do with her hands, something to look at.

"Then tell them the truth."

Azalea looked up to Dorian at that but he was still looking at the game board. "The truth?"

"That you like someone else."

Azalea blushed at that, reminded that he had somehow guessed about how she felt comfortable around Cullen. As though summoned by their thoughts, she caught sight of him walking towards the gardens and, blushing even deeper she sunk down in her seat a little. Dorian, seeing this, looked over his shoulder. Seeing the focus of her attention, he laughed, the deep hearty laugh he had of finding something truly amusing. "And you wonder how I knew about it," he teased.

"I..." she sighed. Her eyes watched the commander until he turned to enter the chantry. She frowned a little, wondering what would drive him there, if he was alright, or if he was worried about something. But of course, he didn't need a reason to visit the chantry and to be honest there was plenty going wrong that could make him feel the need to visit. Or maybe he had a routine and visited often, every three days or something. The truth was she didn't really know. Maybe she should find out, it would be interesting and -

"Your affections are obvious to anyone who knows what to look for, so just tell your family the truth," Dorian said, cutting in to her thoughts.

She shook her head and grimaced. "He's not of the right bloodline. They can't get an alliance out of his family if I marry him."

Dorian laughed again. "Don't I know about that," he said.

Azalea smiled, remembering how Dorian had said that he had left Tevinter because his family had wanted him to marry some girl he had no interest in. Coincidentally, she found herself talking to the one person who likely understood exactly the kind of dilemma she was going through, only she wasn't able to simply abandon her family as Dorian had. The two of them played a few more turns in silence, though the term "playing" wasn't really fair when Azalea was still losing in a spectacular fashion.

"Here's a thought. What if you and I were to become lovers?" Dorian said.

"What?" Azalea's eyebrows would have disappeared into her hairline if they could. "But I'm... I thought... What?"

Dorian's face was practically beaming with delight at having stumped Azalea in such a way. "Yes, I know you fancy the Commander, he's certainly worthy of fancying. But he's not from a good family. I am. We're even related you know."

"Yes, I remember you saying," Azalea said, distractedly.

"So, you allow your family to come to visit and while they're here, we tell them of the fact that you've found someone without their help, someone from House Parvus. Not only is that a noble house, but it is a Tevinter noble house that could provide them with ties to Tevinter. Of course we'll have to give your dear commander warning or he's likely to try to punch my face in, and the rest of your advisers too. And... Perhaps Bull as well." Azalea rose an eyebrow at that, but Dorian ignored her. "By the time they find out that it's all a farce they will have left and returned home, you'll be bedding your dear commander with any luck," the colour threatened to obscure Azalea's face at that casual comment, "and your family obligations will be upheld. You'll be able to politely refuse them to visit in the future citing that you're far to busy dealing with the end of the world and all that."

Azalea blinked, her mind reeling with what Dorian was proposing. It was perfect. It would solve the issue of her family trying to force her to marry without offending them or making it seem as though she had forgotten her heritage. Dorian was from a noble family so there would be no shame in it, perhaps just a little scandal with him being from Tevinter but, as he pointed out, her family would be able to see what they could milk from this fictitious romance to allow them to overlook that fact. Slowly a grin spread over Azalea's face and she felt truly happy as she hadn't for a long time. "Dorian, you are brilliant, I could kiss you!"

"I know, but best not go that far just yet. What will people say?" Dorian said. "And I win. Again. Alright, even as much as I enjoy winning, this is getting ridiculous. I don't even need to cheat!"

"You cheat?" Azalea asked surprised. "How on earth can you cheat at this?"

"Hmm, perhaps I should show you. You might actually offer up a challenge then."


	10. A Few Drinks

A mug of ale was being turned around and around in Azalea's hands. Occasionally she would take a sip but mostly she just stared into it, a small, silly smile on her face. She had meant to meet with Cullen and warn him about Dorian and her plan, to maybe suggest he keep his distance after the official introductions had been made. Instead they had been distracted by... other things. It was all Bull's fault, it was his words that had put the idea fresh in her mind. Bull had wanted her to meet a few of the soldiers under her command and Azalea had obliged. It had been good really, even if it had only reiterated how much they all looked up to her not as a person, but as an idol. In many ways she envied Bull and his charges. He was able to know all the soldiers under his command, it was more like fighting with friends, he knew their strengths and weaknesses and could use both as needed. Azalea didn't really have that option. Afterwards, the two of them had shared a couple of drinks in the tavern, talking about this and that, how each of them had grown up and the like. And then the the topic of commander had come up.

"When are you and the commander going to admit your attraction and go at it already?" Bull had asked, grinning at the blush that it brought out.

Azalea didn't even bother asking how he had known; if what Dorian had said was true then a Ben Hassrath, trained in noticing things, would likely have been the first to see it. Instead, also remembering a throw away comment Dorian had made, countered with "When you do for Dorian. And give me the details."

It had seemed as though Azalea had actually managed to surprise the huge qunari for a moment at that. Then, slowly, a grin spread over his scarred face and he glanced over to where Dorian was sitting alone, eating his dinner. "Aye. You have a deal," Bull eventually said, returning his gaze to Azalea and rising his cup.

Azalea grinned even as she felt a jolt of adrenalin and she tapped her mug to Bull's. She was committed now, no more dancing around it.

She had hoped to bring it up after her family left but... Well it seemed her heart and Cullen himself had other ideas. Though perhaps she really should check that the man hadn't come down too hard on that soldier who had interrupted them. And maybe privately thank him as well. Their moment on the battlements had began with being soft and tender, but once interrupted and the soldier then left, Cullen had practically rounded on Azalea and their kiss had been strong and passionate and had driven out any memory of what she had originally approached the Commander for.

Raising a hand she ran her fingers over her lips, still feeling his against them. Azalea had been worried at first; after all, she was a mage and he had been a templar charged with watching her kind, of forever being suspicious of them. And she was equally worried that her love and trust would be betrayed the way it had before. Cullen had soon put those fears to rest with that kiss.

"I know that look," a familiar voice said. "You finally asked him, huh?"

"Perhaps," Azalea answered slyly as she slid across on the bench to make room for Bull to sit.

"Don't play coy with me, I know what I see."

Azalea chuckled a little at that. "In truth, I'm surprised you haven't heard already," she said. But the again, perhaps that soldier was too terrified of his commander's wrath to risk speaking of what he had seen.

"Maybe I have, maybe I haven't. I want to hear it from you," Bull replied.

So that meant he had heard. Azalea sighed, though even then the smile didn't fade from her face. "Yes, I asked him, he said yes, and we kissed on the battlements," she said, before taking a sip of her ale to cover her amusement at Bull's reaction.

"Ah that's hardly worthy of a story! That's like saying your Fereldan Hero recruited soldiers and killed a dragon, end of blight," Bull said.

Azalea couldn't help but chuckle at that. "I would hardly put our relationship on the same level as the ending of the Blight, but very well." She took another drink. "First though, have you spoken to Dorian?"

"Now, now, I'm not telling you your story until you tell me mine."

Azalea grinned. That meant he had, she was sure, but it wasn't what she had meant. "I meant with regards to our plan on how to handle my family."

"Oh that. Yes, he told me about it. What of it? Are you worried I would get jealous?"

"Perhaps," Azalea said. "Well, I was on my way to tell the commander of this plan and ask that, after meeting my family officially, if he could make himself scarce, maybe go on a scouting trip with Harding or something. But then he looked up from his desk and our eyes met and..." Azalea smiled, staring down into her mug of ale, a mug that was getting rather depleted now. His eyes had been the same colour as that ale, a sort of brownish golden colour. "And I had quite forgotten what I went there to talk about. It's your fault," she said, looking up and rounding on Bull. "If you hadn't put that challenge into my head-"

Bull laughed. "Don't tell me you regret it?"

"No. Never that. I... I think it's perhaps the best thing I've done. At least as far as romance goes. Though that's not particularly hard," Azalea added, thinking again of Derrek. She downed the rest of her drink and ordered another one. "I asked if he could ever see me as more of a mage; after what he's been through at the hands of mages I wouldn't have been surprised if he couldn't see past that part of me. Hurt perhaps, but not surprised. It was part of the reason I was trying to keep my distance from him, to respect that. Well, it turns out he doesn't have a problem with that, he just had dismissed it as a possibility because I have been named the Inquisitor. Once we established that I didn't care what people thought of the Inquisitor seeing the Commander, well." Azalea smiled into her second ale.

"So. Was he any good?" Bull asked over his own ale.

Azalea's smile widened into a grin, remembering the feel of his lips on hers, his hand resting on her waist. "Yes," she said, feeling the butterflies in her stomach once more. "Yes, he's quite... talented."

Bull practically hooted at that, and clapped her on the back hard enough to knock her against the table. "Well I'm glad. With all this shit going on we need to find fun where we can."

"So what about you?" she asked.

"Ah well..." Bull started, rubbing the back of his neck with one massive hand. "Mine didn't go quite so well as that. At least not yet. I found him in the library, flicking through some book or other already tucked away into a little private alcove like he was ready and waiting for me." Azalea snorted at that, highly doubting that Dorian would have agreed with that description. "I leaned in and... We talked."

Azalea waited as Bull took a drink and then fell into silence. "What, that's it? I need more details than that!"

Bull laughed. "He was convinced that I had a problem with him. 'If you have a problem with me just say it,' he said." Azalea couldn't help but grin at Bull's impression of Dorian's superior-than-thou attitude. "I told him, 'I do have a problem. The problem is when we go out in the field you're stuck behind me where I can't watch you.' 'What you don't trust me not to shoot you in the back, is that it?' says he. 'If I were afraid of that, I wouldn't be standing here now, this close to you,' says I. I think I actually stumped him with that," Bull laughed, taking another drink. "Anyway, that was about it before that tranquil woman came up to tell Dorian about some research she did for him or something and he ducked under my arms and escaped. Not before I saw the smile on his face though. No doubt he will claim he was happy that his research was done, but I know otherwise."

"So what's your plan now?" Azalea asked.

"Mmm I don't know. I suppose I'll wait and see how he responds. If he doesn't, I may have to be a bit more clear in my intentions."

"Maybe you should play chess with him, woo him a little. Be warned though, he cheats," Azalea suggested.

"Woo him? You think he'll go for that?" Bull asked. "I don't know, he seemed more like someone who likes it fast and hard."

Azalea blushed a little at the casual way Bull spoke of such things - she still wasn't used to that! - but nodded. "I think he pretends that he doesn't do romance but when actually faced with it, he'll like it."

"Hmm," Bull hummed. He was silent for a little while, just drinking. Then, "Ah, got it. Thanks Boss." And with that he drained the last of his drink, threw some coins on the counter and stood to leave.

Azalea stared after him for a moment or two, then laughed softly to herself, wondering what on earth she had started.


	11. Home

As it was, Azalea had to wait another week before she could speak to Cullen about her family's visit. Instead she had to leave to raid a quarry. Not exactly what Azalea would call a good time, but it had served its purpose, they had found letters that let them find out what Samson was up to so she supposed it was important to be done. Nonetheless the entire time all she had wanted to do was return to Skyhold and spend some time with Cullen. Kiss him yes, but even just to be in his company, to talk or play chess (Dorian's cheats hadn't worked, she was most disappointed), or even just to watch him work though she couldn't imagine he would be particularly impressed with that.

Finally though, she rode her horse through the gates of Skyhold. She was sure that she was expected in the war room to debrief and receive messages that she had missed in being away but in that moment such a thing couldn't be further from her mind. It was funny in a way. Ever since she had made her feelings known to the commander and they had shared that kiss on the battlements it was as though a trigger had been released inside her and she could no longer get him out of her mind. She handed the reins of her horse to a groom and immediately started climbing the battlements, ignoring the chuckle she heard from Blackwall. She didn't like to say she was running, that wasn't it surely, but even she couldn't deny that she was hurrying.

Reaching the door to Cullen's room, Azalea barely managed to pause to knock on the door but she was already opening it when she heard the call to enter being given. She paused only briefly to allow her eyes to take in the sight of him, straightening from where he had been leaning over his desk, a smile spreading over his face seeing her there. His mussed up curly blonde hair, those gorgeous warm eyes, broad shoulders... That was as far as she got before Culled crossed the room in three long steps and wrapped his arms around her, an impassioned embrace that Azalea was eager to return.

"Ah!"

At least until then. Cullen immediately let go at the cry of pain and held her at arms length, a look of concern on his face while the corner of Azalea's mouth lifted in a guilty grimace. "It's nothing," she said, moving in to hug him again, albeit more gently this time.

"It's not nothing if you're crying out in pain," Cullen countered but he allowed her to move in even if he did hold her as though he would break her at any moment. "I'm glad you're back, and safe," he said, his voice quiet.

"Me too," Azalea said. She pulled back only long enough to tilt her head up and bring her lips to his. With her eyes closed she was able to focus entirely on the feelings, the sensations of his lips on hers, his warmth, her warmth in the pit of her stomach, his smell. He smelled different to before, different from when he had lent her his cloak in the Haven chantry, different from when he had carried her through the snow when she was freezing. She couldn't pinpoint what was different but something was.

All too soon Cullen pulled away, though he left his large hands resting on her waist. "What happened, why are you in pain?"

Azalea grimaced. "There were red templars in the quarry," she said. "One of their swordsmen got a bit too close and I didn't get a barrier up quite in time."

"You weren't able to heal yourself?"

"Not with magic. I've dressed it as best I could in the field though. To use magic I need to numb the area, it's too painful otherwise, but if I numb it I can't tell what I'm doing," Azalea explained with a smile. It was something she had tried as an apprentice and failed dismally at, actually causing more damage than she healed. "I'll get Dorian to heal it for me later."

"That's brave," Cullen said wryly.

Azalea laughed. "He's not that bad. He knows the basics. Normally I would ask Vivienne but she's looking into something for me. It's either that or mundane healing."

"If it weren't for the fact it would prolong your pain I would rather that," Cullen said.

Stepping back, moving her hands to cover his and bring them from her waist, just holding them both before her, she said, "Tell you what then. If you go fetch Dorian for me, I'll go to my quarters and you can be in the room with me to make sure that Vint doesn't do anything."

"Agreed," Cullen said.

"Then afterwards... I need to talk to you about something," Azalea added. Seeing the look of concern on his face, she hastened to add, "It's nothing serious, well nothing... It's just something we need to organize for when my family arrives to visit, that's all." She was fumbling her words, she knew, but she didn't want Cullen to think that there was something wrong with their relationship.

"That's not reassuring," Cullen said dryly.

Azalea smiled and, standing on her tip toes, planted a quick kiss on his lips. "We're good, I promise. Go find Dorian and I'll meet you in my quarters," she said and she pulled away from him and left his rooms. Her face felt flushed and the cold mountain air was refreshing. Crossing the inner curtain wall battlements, she entered Solas's gallery, gave him a smile and a nod before continuing to the great hall. It was harder to get through here without being held up, many guests insisting on greeting her and speaking to her. Anyone who actually had something important to speak to her about she was able to redirect to Josephine, and those who just wanted to greet she was becoming skilled at responding and dismissing in the same breath.

Soon enough she was able to slip through the door to her own quarters. The windows had been opened to freshen the room but Azalea moved around the room closing them and lit the fire with a wave of her hand. She then picked up her desk chair and moved it before the fire and considered how she would do this. The templar's sword had sliced into the skin over her shoulder blade and the fleshy part of her shoulder above that. It was in an awkward position and, really, there was no way Dorian would be able to get to it while she kept herself modest. She had been forced to stop wearing her breastband as it was. "Well, at least Dorian will have a laugh," she muttered to herself as she stripped off her outer robes and sat in the chair in her under garments to wait.


	12. Warning

p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Are you lost, Commander?" Dorian asked, seeing Cullen enter the library and look around. He stood out as much from his rich golden curls as from the bewildered lost expression on his face./p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""I.. ah.. No," he said, striding over towards Dorian. "No, the Inquisitor needs your healing skills, she was injured in the last mission."p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Right to the point, I see. No small talk? It's not really much of a date then, is it?"p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"The blank look on Cullen's face was comical. "What? No, the Inquisitor needs-"p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Yes, yes, I heard you, very well," Dorian said dryly. "Lead the way, I should at least be able to enjoy the view."p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""I..." Cullen sighed and obliged, leading the way down the stairs from the library and across the great hall. Dorian had to admit, he did enjoy the view; the commander was a very good looking man. It was just a pity he was only interested in one person. Though with that, Dorian was glad it was Azalea; the two of them had become good friends and he knew that she needed the support. Oh, Dorian could talk to her of magical things, as could Vivienne and Solas, and the commander could help with military matters. But if Cullen could be the one to keep her happy in more than an emotional way.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Reaching the Inquistor's room Cullen called out, "Trevelyan, are you decent?"p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Not for long," a voice called out.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Dorian gave a snort of laughter at that and said, "Excellent, you're getting ready for me already." He laughed even more seeing the death stare the dear commander was giving him. Dorian simply pushed past him and climbed the stairs to Azalea's main room. The Inquisitor was sitting backwards on a chair, her arms resting on the back rest. Her shirt was pulled up over her head so her entire back was bare but she had lifted her under shirt over her head so it covered her breasts. It did reveal not only the sword gash but a number of colourful bruises scattered over her body. Dorian heard Cullen give a wordless grunt seeing it.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Usually you're supposed to avoid getting hit," Dorian said. Azalea snorted in laughter at that. "I don't think I'll be able to do anything for the bruises."p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""That's alright, they'll heal fine. I can walk you through how to heal the cut," Azalea said.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""That might be best," Dorian was forced to admit. He had learned basic healing Vyrantium Circle but it wasn't his forte. Unfortunately for Azalea she was perhaps the best magical healer the Inquisition had. Dorian was more suited to flashy things like fire and explosions.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Azalea rested her forehead on her arms, ignoring Cullen as he sat on the couch to watch. "You'll need to numb the area first," she said. "If you feel it out, they look white, like bright cords threading under the skin. You need to dull them, to quieten them."p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Dorian couldn't help but smile at the description. It wasn't the way he had been taught but it gave an idea as to how she interacted with her magic. Doing as she instructed he heard her give a sigh of relief as the pain was eased and it made him realize how much she must have been hiding her pain when they arrived. "That's better," she said quietly.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""I thought you said you could numb it yourself?" Cullen said from the couch, his voice slightly accusatory.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""I can. I have to sometimes but it's tiring and distracting to do it all the time so I don't bother when it's not required," Azalea said. Then to Dorian, "If you see the skin and the muscles as fabric with the strands that have been cut, or split. You want to pull them together and reweave them, each strand going under and over the one it's meant to. Then use a bit of heat to melt them together. Does that make sense?"p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""It does. I've never heard of healing magic being described that way," Dorian said as he did as she instructed.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""In truth, that's how I taught the apprentices at the Ostwick circle. But it never made much sense to me at first. I hear magic."p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""You hear it?"p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Yes. Nerves have a high pitched, pure sound, like a soprano holding a high note. A wound is like... like someone trying to play the violin when they have no idea what they're doing, that screeching. When I heal it's like I'm smoothing out the sound and making it more natural."p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Sounds noisy, I would get a headache."p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Azalea laughed at that. "I do, when I'm healing a lot. That's another reason I don't numb it all the time, Cullen," she said. "If I ignore it, I don't hear it, but when I use my magic on it, the noise drives me to distraction."p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""I see," Cullen said.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""I don't, I hear," Azalea shot back.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Dorian laughed a little at that, and even the stoic commander cracked a smile. "There," Dorian said. "It's not pretty, but it's probably the best I can do."p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Thank you," Azalea said, raising a hand over her shoulder to feel it. There was a red raised scar there but it would probably fade eventually.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Azalea pulled her under shirt back over head so she was wearing it properly and stood up. Cullen waited a moment or two, then cleared his throat, looking pointedly at Dorian.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Right. Well I can take a hint. Have fun, and tell me all about how filthy you both get," Dorian said, then ducked the pillow that the Inquisitor tossed at his head. He laughed loudly, imagining the blushing commander, as he descended the stairs.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"***p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Azalea rolled her shoulders experimentally after Dorian had left, readjusting to the feeling of the tight scarring there. It still ached but it already felt much better. Dorian's healing was clumsy, she could feel that now that the numbing had been removed, but it did the job.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Are you alright now?" Cullen asked, standing and coming close.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Azalea smiled up to Cullen. "Yes, thank you," she said. She stood on her toes and planted a kiss on his cheek before pulling away and finding a simple dress to pull over her head. She wasn't planning on going anywhere for the rest of the day at least and she missed wearing dresses. The one she selected was fairly plain, a tanned colour with a darker under bust corset that she fastened with a practised ease. Out of the corner of her eye she caught Cullen licking his lips and looking away. She felt heat rise to her own face at the thought that he was thinking those things but she couldn't deny that it wasn't a thrill as well.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""There was, ah," Cullen cleared his throat. "Wasn't there something you needed to discuss with me? About your family?"p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Yes," Azalea said. She moved across the room and took Cullen's hand, leading him to sit on the couch with her.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Your family don't approve of me, is that it?" Cullen guessed. They had discussed this briefly and, while Azalea had acknowledged that her family would care she had reassured him that she didn't.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""My family don't know about you," Azalea said. "But they have been trying to get me to marry since I turned sixteen. The last time I saw them I didn't leave on the best of terms. My mother tried to set me up with a good dozen single men. I... lost my temper at her and left early, returning to the circle. That was right before all the trouble started." Cullen nodded in understanding. "Well, her letter doesn't say, but I can guarantee that my mother won't be coming alone, she will have brought friends with eligible sons to court me. And if I tell them that I'm with them... Well, I can guarantee that the least she'll do is try to sabotage our relationship."p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""So what's your plan?" Cullen asked.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Actually, it's Dorian's idea. No, don't look at me like that," Azalea added seeing the grimace that crossed Cullen's face. "Though I know you probably won't like it. He suggested..." she sighed. "Well, I guess there's no easy way to say this. Dorian suggested that I pretend that I'm in a relationship with him. My family will accept him because of his birth and stop nagging me about it. And once they've gone, I can rebuff them and refuse to let them visit, my social obligations complete so they can no longer interfere when they find out that the relationship is bogus." The two of them were silent for a moment or two, the whole time Azalea was fidgeting, pulling at her dress, brushing a strand of hair that had come loose over her ear, eyes darting around the room. Then, "You hate me don't you," she said.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""No! No, of course not," Cullen was quick to insist. He turned and took both of Azalea's hands in his, putting a stop to her fidgeting. "No I definitely don't hate you. I can't pretend to like the idea, but I don't hate you for it. I guess I just want to know when the pretence will end."p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""As soon as my family leaves. I don't think they'll be here for more than a week, especially when my mother accepts that her meddling is over."p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""And what about after?"p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""After there will be no need for pretence because I will have performed my familiar duties, they won't need to visit after that."p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""So you intend to never see your family again after this?"p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""No I..." Azalea trailed off with a sigh.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you," Cullen said.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Azalea shook her head. "No, I get where you're coming from. It just wasn't something I considered. It's not something that we need to worry about before Corypheus is dealt with. Provided we succeed at that and we both survive then I will come clean to my family about us. After that the marcher nobles' opinion won't matter so much."p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Promise?"p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Azalea smiled. "I promise," and she leaned in to kiss him. Cullen leaned in also and guided her to lay down on the couch and she wrapped her arms around him, holding him close as they kissed.p 


	13. Family Reunion

p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Azalea and Dorian stood atop the ramparts looking down over the long stone bridge to Skyhold, the banners of the Trevelyan family drawing ever closer and, as she had suspected, accompanied by the banners of several other families as well. Watching them approach, Azalea couldn't help but grip her hands to the stone in front of her, her knuckles turning white. A tanned hand covered hers and she looked up with a smile to Dorian standing beside her. "Don't worry, we'll blow them away with our quote-unquote relationship and then it will be done," he said./p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Azalea shot him a tight smile and nodded, but the smile didn't meet her eyes. She wasn't convinced. Dorian and her were friends, yes, but could they convince her overbearing mother that they were more than that? Or would someone else give away the truth of the matter? They obviously hadn't informed the whole of the Inquisition about their scheme, but she hoped that people who didn't know her as well as others didn't know about her relationship with the commander, or if they did or had seen their rather public kiss on the battlements they would believe the story that she and the commander were having trouble and she had turned to Dorian instead. In the end it didn't really matter what they thought so long as they didn't spread the truth around.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Suddenly Azalea leaned forward, squinting against the glare of sunlight on snow to make out one of the banners, then broke out into a huge, genuine grin. "Caleb!" she called out before pushing back away from the wall and starting to run down the battlements, pausing only when Dorian snagged her hand and pulled her to a stop.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Anything I should know?" he asked.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Still smiling, Azalea said, "Caleb is my twin brother. He joined the templars so he could be assigned to the Ostwick Circle to be with me but he hadn't finished his training when everything went bad. He covered for me when I left that last party disaster."p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Dorian nodded and let her go, following at a more sedate pace. While Azalea grabbed a horse and cantered out to meet up with her brother, he stayed by the gatehouse and watched, a small smile on his face. He was jealous, he couldn't deny that. Once he might have ridden out to meet his family with such eagerness, but now it would likely be with the same apprehension that Azalea had greeted the arrival of her mother. Ah well. It would be amusing to find out what kind of reaction his family would have after word of this bogus engagement reached them. In fact, Dorian rather looked forward to it.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"He watched as the first of the procession passed him and started dismounting in the court yard, a bustle of servants to take their things to the rooms that had been assigned to them, grooms taking their horses, and Josephine overseeing it all like the matriarch she was. There was a chaos to it, but an organized chaos. And Azalea and the templar she was riding next to her who was obviously her brother rode into the midst of it.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""This is a fine looking castle you have here, sis," the templar said.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Azalea grinned, clearly pleased with his praise. "It's coming along. It was damaged by the weather when we arrived, and some parts are still off limits because they're too dangerous, but it's mostly repaired now," she said. Dismounting she gestured for Dorian to come closer to them, which he did. "This is Caleb Trevelyan, my twin brother and a templar, and this," she gestured to a dignified and stern looking older woman who approached them from behind, "is my mother, Maria Trevelyan." Coming to stand next to Dorian and slipping an arm through his, she said, "And this, this is Dorian Pavus of Tevinter, my fiancée."p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Dorian, grinning, executed a perfect court bow, though his eyes never left the faces of Azalea's family's. Their shocked expressions made the ruse worth while and he didn't even have to pretend to be delighted. "Pleased to finally meet you both," he says.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Fiancée?" Maria repeated, her mouth hanging slightly open.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""I know, it's all a bit sudden, but, well, after spending so much time together fighting demons and all, we just couldn't deny our feelings to each other any longer," Dorian declared before Azalea could answer.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Hmm," was all Maria said, though the tight downturn of the corners of her mouth was response enough.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Caleb on the other hand was grinning broadly and seemed genuinely pleased with the announcement. Before he got a chance to say anything though, Azalea spoke. "There are a few other people you should meet," she said, leading them to where her advisers were waiting. Dorian kept a careful watch on the commander as the three of them were introduced to her family. He was hiding his distaste well enough, Dorian supposed, but there was one hand he was holding hidden behind his back and Dorian could guarantee that it would be clenched tight. Especially, since he refused to meet Dorian's eye at all. Oh well, he would just spread a few rumours how the dear commander had a thing for their inquisitor but in the end it was Dorian's looks and charms that won the day.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"***p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""So how did the two of you meet? I'm afraid you've caused quite the scandal."p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Dorian grinned at Caleb as the templar took a seat next to him at the bar. "Scandal and mayhem, it's what I live for," he said, saluting with his cup and taking a drink, grimacing at the taste but getting it down anyway. He rather liked Azalea's brother, though they hadn't had a chance to chat like this without everyone overhearing. Azalea for her part was busy talking to her mother and trying to come her down. Apparently their plan hadn't worked as easily as they had hoped: she was furious that her daughter hadn't even had the sense to write to her to inform her of this engagement. Her excuse was that it was new enough that she knew they would have left Ostwick already but apparently that wasn't good enough for her mother. Though Dorian had caught Caleb struggling not to laugh at his mother's outbursts on several occasions. "The story is actually something that you wouldn't believe even if I told you."p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Oh you're not going to spout that time travel nonsense as well, are you? Azi already told me that story."p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Azi?" Dorian laughed at the cute nickname. "I'll have to remember that one. And yes, that is actually what happened. I know it to be fact because I was the one who invented the magic." Dorian would have felt hurt about the incredulous look Caleb gave him at that if he didn't already know it was a hard to swallow story. "Normally it would remain in the realms of theory as it was when I first started playing with the idea, but it seems that the breach interferes with how magic is supposed to work, amplifying some things and diminishing others. span style="font-style: oblique;"Azispan and I are still researching it."/p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Caleb shook his head, his face still creased with disbelief. "If it wasn't for the fact that I've rarely known Azalea to lie about anything this serious I would never even consider believing you. Would probably even recommend you be locked up for madness. But... So much of what's going on is already mad. I mean little Azi, the Inquisitor and Herald of Andraste?"p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Little? I thought she said you were twins," Dorian asked with an amused smile.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Aye, well, I was born first of the two of us and when we were born I was the larger of the two babies. Gregory, our older brother, insisted that I was trying to absorb her into me like some kind of leech," the man snorted at that and Dorian smiled. He sighed then and continued, "I mean the last time we saw her was our last name day, then the next letter we get she says she's safe and at Haven. And then nothing for months. It was only through rumour and other travellers that we hear she was still alive and at this place, some place that just span style="font-style: oblique;"appearedspan out of the mountains that everyone seemed to know was called Skyhold despite it being abandoned when you arrived."/p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Dorian grimaced at that and had to admit he felt bad for Caleb. Of course he would worry, especially since she hadn't written since before Haven. Oh of course there were always reasons, what with the whole destruction of the world and all, but he also knew what it was like to avoid contacting family just because it was too hard to deal with. "She was badly hurt in the attack on Haven," he said, as though trying to excuse his 'fiance's' silence.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Yes, we heard it was attacked, by some mad magister?" Caleb asked, cocking an eye in Dorian's direction.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""You could say that. More accurately it was overwhelmed. Corypheus is the name of this magister or whatever he is, though he's no magister I recognise. Your brave sister decided to hold him off on her own to aim and fire our last trebuchet, causing an avalanche. Our commander found her half-dead and frozen in the snow. She doesn't talk of it, but somehow she survived and tried to follow us, despite her battered and broken body." Dorrian took another drink remembering that. He had been so scared for her seeing her cradled in the commander's arms. She had looked so small and pale, more like a corpse than a living person, and for a while there they weren't sure she would survive. The commander had been convinced it was only that damnable cat at her stomach sharing body heat that had kept her alive and so of course it had had enjoyed prized pampered attention all the way to Skyhold and was still allowed free reign of the castle despite Dorian's obvious and rather severe reaction to it.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""It's just so hard to imagine," Caleb said quietly, staring into his own drink. "The last I saw of her she was a typical quiet, bookish mage, more interested in her studies and research than anything else around her. She always hated social gatherings, even as a girl, but especially so when our mother kept trying to set us up. I think she was particularly disappointed when I joined the templar order, though my father was proud. Us Trevelyans have a long history in serving the Chantry you know," he said, the corner of his mouth tilting up in a smile.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""What was she like, as a girl?" he asked, curious. Though in truth part of him just wanted to watch those lips move.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""She hasn't spoken of her childhood?"p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Dorian shook his head. "No, not a lot. I believe she misses home, something I can sympathise with, so I don't pry."p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Ah well." Caleb leaned back in his chair, resting his drink on his stomach contemplatively. "As you might expect, she was always good at her studies, enjoyed learning in a way that I never did. So much so that she often convinced me to switch places with her," Caleb said with a laugh.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""What, seriously?" Dorian asked surprised, looking Caleb up and down with a new eye.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Oh yes. As children, before puberty, we looked very much alike. So much so that if she bundled her hair up inside a hat and I wore a wig, we could change clothes and not even our parents could tell the difference."p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""What about that scar on her eyebrow?" Dorian asked, curious how that had happened, but Caleb just shook his head.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""She didn't have that last I saw her. If she had it when you met her then I would guess it would be from when the mages at the circle rebelled. Without that, we still look somewhat alike."p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Yes, Dorian could see it now he was looking for it. Oh, he could tell they were siblings the moment he laid eyes on the pair of them riding into Skyhold together, but now he could see just how alike they were, the same dark brown hair, though Caleb's was rather windblown where Azalea kept hers tightly braided around her hair, the same bright green-blue eyes, the same high brow, though Caleb's was largely masked by the way his hair fell over it. Even their nose and cheekbones were the same. Yes, he could easily see how they would be nearly identical before puberty changed them. "So I see," he said eventually. "And I must say, I rather like the similarities," he added, before he could stop himself.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Caleb didn't seem to notice his blunder though, only grinning and saluting him with his drink before drinking. Knowing that the more he drank the less he would be able to control his, well, his urges, Dorian quickly drained his drink and stood, stretching and ignoring the slight spin the world gave him at his sudden rise. "Well, I think it's time for bed for me. I'm sure Azalea will be kept for hours by her mother so I may as well get some rest before she returns," he said with a lewd wink.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Caleb laughed and said, "I doubt it. More likely she lost her patience with dear mother and stormed off. But give her a kiss from me when you see her, will you?"p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Will do," Dorrian replied with a courtly bow before leaving the tavern, pulling his cloak tightly around him as he was hit by the icy mountain air.p 


	14. Secrets

p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Cullen groaned and leaned against his desk and pain shot through his body. It felt as though his very nerves were on fire and he was alternately dazed and in a fog, and then acutely aware of his surroundings to the point where it was confusing working out all the sensations he was experiencing. Yesterday he had stayed in the courtyard only long enough to pay the proper greetings to the inquisitor's family and retainers before fleeing to his room. Let the others believe he was hiding jealousy in doing so - not an incorrect fact but not one that was forefront in his mind - it was better than them believing he was starting to struggle with breaking the hold lyrium had over him. And today it the pain was even worse./p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Closing his eyes and holding his head, Cullen tried to focus on his breathing, in and out, in and out, trying to make his breaths deeper than the ragged gasps they wanted to be. Azalea had taught him that when he first told her of his wish to be free from lyrium. Focus only on his breathing, block everything else out and only listen to his breathing. In. Out. In. Out.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"After a minute or so of that Cullen straightened feeling more in control of himself again. Oh his body still hurt, he still felt as though he were walking around in a dream haze, but he could bare it, he knew he could. He span style="font-style: oblique;"hadspan to. Josephine had organized a feast tonight to celebrate the inquisitor's and Dorian's 'engagement'. The story was they had held off until her family would arrive so they could celebrate it with them. Cullen didn't care, he didn't want to go. Even though he knew it was false, seeing Azalea with Dorian holding hands and smiling all the time, he couldn't help but wonder and worry. What if he drove her away with this addiction? She had every right to fear templars after all that had happened, he had to be rid of the lyrium that made him one of them, but what if he couldn't do it? Would he drive her into Dorian's arms instead? He had seen how relaxed she was with him, she let her walls down in the same way he had thought was reserved only for him, and she seemed to genuinely enjoy his flirting and even flirt right back sometimes./p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"But no. She had span style="font-style: oblique;"promisedspan him it was only a temporary arrangement, she didn't feel for Dorian in that way and they were only friends. He could endure this just as he could endure his lyrium withdrawal./p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Pushing himself away from the desk, Cullen drew himself up with a force of effort. No matter how hard things got, he had a duty and right now that duty required him to make an appearance at this feast, and a pleasant appearance at that. Swinging his fur cloak around his shoulders, he fastened it and stepped outside. The icy wind was bracing and it helped to ground him. Coming from southern Feraldan he had never minded the cold, found it reassuring and comforting even, so long as he was properly dressed for it.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Making his way across the battlements, he followed the sounds of music, laughter, and talking to the great hall where, unsurprisingly, the feast was already well underway.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Curly! Come sit here, we saved you a seat," Varrik called out to him and Cullen obliged, sitting down between Varrik and Solas, with Cole opposite. He was a little unnerved sitting across from that spirit boy - he seemed to have an uncanny awareness of what was going through everyone's mind and that was the last thing he wanted right now. He just hoped he would be distracted by how many people would be here. Putting Cole and his creepy mind reading abilities from his, ahem, mind, Cullen scanned the crowds. The great hall was set up with three long trestle tables, one against each wall, and a third across it on the dais where the throne normally was. It was this third table that had the Inquisitor, her family, and Dorian seated there. Cullen's gaze was instantly drawn to the gown she was wearing. It must have cost a fortune, made in emerald green Orlesian silks, trimmed in a sky blue with gold threads. It matched her eyes perfectly and brought out the unusual colour of them. Her hair was done up in its normal braids but had added pearls that shone in the firelight whenever she turned her head. She looked truly splendid and Cullen's heart ached for the fact that he could not be with her, could not tell her as much. Her and Dorian sat in the place of command in the centre of the table, side by side. On Dorian's other side was the man Trevelyan had introduced as her twin brother, Caleb. Lelliana's spies and Josephine's connections had reported that as soon as he was old enough he had intended to become a templar to keep his sister company in the Ostwick Circle. He was well on his way on that path when the trouble started though and Azalea fled but, since he hadn't yet completed his training, he wasn't assigned there and thus wasn't involved. Probably a good thing; Cullen doubted that he would have been able to partake in the Right of Annulment against his own sister, not when he had gone there to protect her. It seemed he had finished his training now though but, for some reason, had stayed away from the others in his order and travelled with his family instead.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Next to the Inquisitor was her mother and Cullen had to smile a little at that; Azalea did not look particularly happy with this arrangement. He knew that mother and daughter had a strained relationship, though he would have thought the woman would be happy her daughter was marrying someone of noble blood. After all, that was the whole point of this charade, was it not? Though he couldn't actually hear what was being said, perhaps the woman was badgering her about wedding plans or some-such. Cullen took a long drink, barely noticing what it was he was drinking or eating. Conversation flowed around him but he was ignored for the most part. Those closest to him seemed to sense his inner turmoil and were content to let him be, a fact he was grateful for.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Most of the feast passed in this manner and Cullen was able to ignore it all. Even when the call was put out for speeches, he mostly just stared into his mug, paying it all no attention. So long as he was seen to make an appearance, that was all that mattered; he didn't have to actively participate. And that was easy enough to manage, especially with the occasional twinge of pain still shooting through his body.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"At least, so he thought until he heard a voice, Sera's, shout out over the din.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Snog 'er!"p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"He looked up at that, first a glance to Sera who looked well into her cups, her cheeks red and swaying a little in her seat, then to where Azalea and Dorian were standing, evidently having just been giving a speech of some sort. Azalea was looking at him, just as he was looking at her. Surely she wouldn't, surely she could say something to stop the encouraging shouts and banging. But she didn't, and then Dorian turned her and, holding her head, hand laced in her hair the way Cullen liked to do, he leaned in and kissed her, long and deep. At first Azalea didn't react, but as soon as she did and started returning it, Cullen saw red.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"***p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Azalea was caught off guard when Dorian actually acted upon Sera's suggestion, grabbing her and kissing her. Then her brain caught up and she realized they had to play the act of newly engaged lovers or her family would never believe it, especially Caleb who knew her so well so, with an apologetic glance to Cullen, she closed her eyes and returned the kiss. And, in truth, it wasn't half bad; Dorian was definitely a talented kisser but it still didn't feel right. His moustache tickled and his lips were missing that rough patch from Cullen's scar. After what seemed like forever, though likely was only a few seconds, they broke away and, blushing, Azalea turned to face the whoops and cheering of the crowds gathered for the feast. Even her mother was wearing a smile.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"At least until they saw Cullen charging up towards them.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Before either of the two mages could throw up a barrier, Cullen's fist slammed into Dorian's face, sending him flying back.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Cullen, stop!" Azalea shouted and, miraculously, the man stopped even as he was about to charge into Dorian again. I'm sorry, she wanted to say. She wanted to kiss him, to hold him and ease that pained look of betrayal from his face. "That's enough," was all she said, though her voice was quieter then.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Cullen tore his eyes from Dorian's prone form to look at Azalea instead, briefly, before he turned on his heal and stalked out of the great hall. Brief though it was, that glance was enough to send a lance of pain through Azalea's heart and tears sprung to her eyes unbidden. The look of anger and betrayal and span style="font-style: oblique;"hurtspan was almost more than she could bare. But before she could hurry out after him - her family be damned - Vivienne took a hold of her forearm, stilling her./p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""See to Dorian, my dear," she said quietly.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Azalea wanted nothing more than to rip her hand out of the mage's grasp and continue after Cullen - it was Cullen she cared about, not Dorian! - but even with her heart ache her brain took over her body in the same way it had when she had accepted the title of Inquisitor. She had a role to play and, for now, that was that of a woman who's lover had just been punched. Drawing herself up, she turned to Vivienne. "Thank you," she whispered, acknowledging the woman's quick intervention from stopping her from straying from her role. "Could you... ?"p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Vivienne smiled. "Of course my dear," she said, before she turned to the gathered guests. As she started speaking, apologising for the interruption and distracting them with some story or other from her time in Orlais, Azalea hurried to where Dorian was laying back as though grievously injured.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""What was all that about?" Azalea snapped at the man as she took his chin to turn his face to the light. "You're not hurt that badly."p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""No, but it looks good when you come rushing to my rescue, does it not?" Dorian replied with that cheeky grin of his that looked slightly ridiculous with his left eye starting to swell shut. He grunted a little as Azalea poked it. "Didn't think he would hit me so hard though."p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""You deserved it, kissing me like that. I'm only surprised Bull didn't also come charging up like his namesake," Azalea said. She took advantage of Dorian's surprised pause to bring a light coating of ice to her fingers and hold it to Dorian's swollen eye to take the heat out, ignoring when the man gave a hiss of pain.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""How... I don't know what you're talking about," Dorian tried.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"It was Azalea's turn to give a snort at that. "Yes you do. You're not the only one who can see what goes on beneath the surface. Don't worry, I doubt anyone but Cole has noticed, but I do travel with you two more than anyone else. I was bound to notice something." Sighing, she pulled her hand away and checked over the eye. The ice had drawn the swelling out but it was still colourful. She could probably draw that away too but in truth it would probably help their cause if there was a visual reminder. With a slight wave of her hand she numbed the area so that, even if it wouldn't be removed entirely it wouldn't be sore.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""I could have done that you know," Dorian complained.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""I know." Azalea glanced over her shoulder towards the doorway Cullen had left through. "I'm guessing there's no politically correct way I can go to him now, is there?" She stood and offered Dorian a hand up, which he took.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Probably not but I'm sure no one will mind if you leave early. I, however, am going to plead a headache and retire."p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Azalea scoffed. "Tell Bull he's a lucky... bull," she said, grinning at the blush her comment caused and watching as her 'fiancee' left. It was with no surprise that Bull excused himself soon after.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Slowly, painfully slowly it seemed to Azalea, people started drifting off and, as soon as she judged it polite enough to do so, she excused herself. Saying she wanted to walk the battlements for an hour or so to clear her head before bed gave her the perfect excuse to visit Cullen's rooms. The wind outside was freezing and her Orlesian silken gown, while fine inside with the warmth of the roaring fires, was totally unsuited for the mountainous winds and she wrapped her arms about herself in an attempt to keep the heat in. Nonetheless, she paused outside of Cullen's door, nervous about what she would find within. Would he accept her and her apologies? Would he even want to see her or would he turn her away as soon as he laid eyes on her? Or, worse, would he scream and shout, and then break up with her. The fear of that was nearly enough to turn her away, to cause her to run back to her own rooms where she could go to bed and hide under the cover and pretend that none of this was happening, at least for a little while. But she knew that if anything was to end their relationship it would be her not apologizing for what happened. Still she hesitated, trying to mentally work out what she would say to him.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"span style="font-style: oblique;"Crash!span/p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"The door was flung open and Azalea hurried inside before she was really even aware that she had made the decision. WIth a glance she took in the complete disorder of the room; it looked as though someone had attacked him here. His desk, that big solid thing, was over turned, the contents spread over the floor, his chair smashed against the wall, books swept from the shelves. But even all this devastation, Azalea had eyes only for Cullen. He had his back to her and seemed not to have noticed her come in. He was standing against the opposite wall to her, his arm up against the wall and his head resting against his forearm. His cloak had been abandoned and it revealed scratches on the back of his neck.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Concerned, Azalea took a step forward. "Cullen?"p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Stay back!" Cullen snapped, though his voice sounded strange, kind of dazed. "Amell... what have I done to you?" Cullen said in a hoarse whisper.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Azalea frowned. Amell? Who was he referring to? The Amells had been involved in both the Blight in Fereldan since the Hero of Fereldan was an Amell, and the events in Kirkwall. Regardless, Azalea figured she could ask it later.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Cullen, it's me," she said quietly, coming up behind him and placing a hand on his shoulder. She was unprepared for the sudden reaction that caused, Cullen's arm lashing out and shoving her none too gently. Before she could fall fare though that shoving hand turned to one that gripped her forearm and held her upright. "Maker, I'm so sorry," he whispered as he drew her close and wrapped his arms around her. "I thought... I didn't know it was you."p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Azalea let out the breath she hadn't realized she was holding as she returned the hug, noting with concern the trembling muscles beneath his sweat-soaked shirt. And his heat. Frowning, she pulled away and rose a hand to his forehead. It was burning up. "You have a fever," she said, letting her hand cup his cheek. He leaned his face into her hand, seeming to take pleasure from the coolness of her skin. "Why didn't you tell me you were sick?"p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Cullen shook his head. "Not sick. Just... withdrawal. From lyrium."p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Is that what this is?" Azalea asked, a sweeping hand gesture taking in the devastation of the room around them.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Cullen blinked and stared blankly at the room as though noticing it for the first time. "I guess it is," he said slowly.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Come on. Let's get you up that ladder and into bed," Azalea said, leading the commander to the ladder and practically pushing him to go up it before her. She was worried that he might fall but he managed it, though it left him breathless, sitting on the ground as Azalea climbed up herself. She slipped an arm around him and helped him to the bed where, she figured, if he was going to pass out he could at least be more comfortable. "Let me have a look at your hand," she said. Taking it, she tsked over the bruised knuckles but as she called upon her magic to heal it, Cullen snatched his hand away.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""No!" he said. "No magic. Please."p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Azalea looked at him for a long while, then nodded and said, "Alright. No magic. I promise. But I'm staying with you tonight."p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""You can't. Your family-"p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Can be sent to the Fade for all I care right now. You need me. That mess you made downstairs is proof enough of that and I know you're in pain. Besides." Reaching up to her shoulders, she pulled a few strings and the ties loosened, her dress pooling on the floor around her feet, her nipples pert from the cold, obvious through the sheer material of her undergown. "You wouldn't really send me back to the great hall in such a state of undress, now would you?"p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""No, we can't have that," Cullen said.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Glad to finally see that half smile she loved so much, Azalea crossed the room to Cullen's bed, lightly pushing him to lay down in it and laying down next to him. She wasn't interested in sex with him (well that's a lie, she was very interested in sex with him, just not at this very moment) and she doubted he would be up for it either but that didn't mean she couldn't comfort him in other ways, however she could. No one would miss her for the rest of the night, all would be fine.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"***p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"A dark eyebrow rose as Caleb watched his sister enter the commander's rooms and no leave them. She had even neglected to close the door behind her so he had seen that rather intimate display between the two of them even if he couldn't hear what was being said. It made it abundantly clear to him what was going on and he had to admire his sister for her cunning, and for the loyalty of her friends to carry on with the scheme. It meant a change in plans but his plans could still go ahead.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Watching until he saw them climb a ladder to the upper level - a level he knew he wouldn't be able to peer within - Caleb left to his own rooms, carefully closing and locking the door behind him before using his templar abilities to negate all chance of magic being used within the room. He didn't sense anything and he doubted anyone suspected anything, but that didn't mean he could be careless. Pulling the amulet from its hidden pocket in his pack he looked at it a long while. The red tear-drop gem caught within a golden clasp whispered to him, called to him, though he couldn't understand the words. Sometimes he almost thought it sang to him and he wondered if that was what Azalea heard when she described how she could hear magic sing to her. It didn't matter. He had a job to do and soon it would be time for him to do it. He just had to notify his superiors to the change in plans before he could go through with it.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Taking what looked like a broach from his pocket, he placed it on the desk and sat before it. Running a finger over the gem seemed to activate something inside it and, though he had no idea how the magic worked, he heard the voice through it nonetheless.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"span style="font-style: oblique;""Yes? What is it?"span/p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""It seems the Inquisitor has been deceiving us all. It is not the Vint she fancies at all, but her commander."p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"span style="font-style: oblique;""Is that a problem?"span/p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""He may be harder to control. He's a templar as well so our normal methods will not work against him. And he will be more protected than the Vint. Though he seems to be unwell or something."p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"span style="font-style: oblique;""What is his name?"span/p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Cullen. Cullen Rutherford."p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"A pause.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"span style="font-style: oblique;""He will be no problem. He was tortured while in the mage circle in Fereldan. He was in love with a mage named Amell. Use that against him and he will break easily. The inquisitor will be keen to keep her romance a secret. Proceed as planned."span/p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Yes, my lord," Caleb said and, with a touch, the gem went silent once more.p 


	15. Mother, dear

p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Mother, please," Azalea pleaded, running an exasperated hand through her messy hair. It was barely an hour past dawn and already her mother had barged into her room, unannounced mind, and demanded to know why there were preparations to leave being made in the Skyhold courtyard./p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Don't you 'Mother, please' me!" Maria snapped. "I span style="font-style: oblique;"knowspan when you're planning to get rid of me. It was the same in Ostwick only this time I'm the one who'll be leaving instead of you. I have not said I am ready to leave yet and frankly you need me around what with this wedding to plan and all, and I know you haven't done any kind of planning in that regard. Does Dorian's family even know about your engagement?"/p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""No not yet," Azalea said with a sigh, lifting Enasal from her lap where she had been sleeping to the bed beside her before removing the blankets and standing with a stretch. "He's not on the best of terms with his family," she said. "They're working to mend that but we decided we didn't want to rush things. Corypheus is the real threat we have to-"p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Yes, yes. That's all I hear from you people Corypheus this, Corypheus that. There are more important things that that insane magister you know and they need to be organized so that when you tire of this Inquisition business and you come home you will be ready. I can accept holding off the wedding until then - though don't you dare go spreading your legs for him until then! - but plans must still be made!"p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Little did she know that ship had already flown, Azalea thought to herself. It wasn't something that she was going to tell her mother, however; she would only fuss how she had given up her 'greatest womanly gift' to someone she wasn't married to which had obviously been the reason that relationship never went anywhere. It was something that Azalea just couldn't deal with at the moment. "Yes, plans must be made, and you're free to make them. At Ostwick."p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Azalea Boudica Trevelyan, I refuse to be-"p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Now if you would just let me explain I would have been able to tell you that the preparations you're seeing aren't for you," Azalea cut in impatiently. That seemed to shut her up at least, however briefly.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Who are they for then?"p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Myself. The Inquisition has been offered an alliance with the Qunari, as well as the use of one of the dreadnaughts. You may be dismissive of the threat Corypheus poses but I am not and we need all the help we can get. Therefore I intend to leave around midday for the Storm Coast with Dorian, Bull and Varrik."p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""The tall one and the short one?"p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Azalea turned her back on her mother then to hide her smile. "Yes," she answered. Going to her chest of drawers, she pulled out her more practical leathers and a tub of sheep's wool oil to waterproof them. "Bull is Qunari and it's his people who are offering the alliance. Dorian is my fiancée so of course I want him to come, and he's magic is a useful back up to my own. And Varrik is... Well he's good with that cross bow of his and he is less likely to balls up this alliance by saying the wrong thing like Sera is," she said. Her mother nodded in agreement to that; despite the fact that the two Trevelyan women rarely got along, Azalea respected that her mother was very good at planning things so she was relieved that the woman agreed with her choice of companions for this journey. She may not know her companions as well as Azalea did but she had met them all and knew enough to get a sense of them. "I was hoping that you and your retainers would come with me and we could see you across the straight to Ostwick before meeting with the Qunari. Has Caleb told you he intends to stay with the Inquisition?"p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Yes," Maria said, though the pursing of her lips made it clear that she wasn't happy with the idea.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""You still have Gregory to fuss over and it's not like Caleb wouldn't have been sent away from home anyway if the mess at the Conclave had never happened. He's a good fighter and I've seen him sparring with Blackwall and Cassandra. Even they have to admit he's talented, if a little brash. We need him here."p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Yes yes, but that's another thing, that conclave. Why on earth did you feel the need to go there? After the mages rebelled you should have stayed out of it and come home! Not gone gallivanting off across the countryside to who knows what danger!"p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Azalea, part way through waterproofing her armour, paused at that. "The span style="font-style: oblique;"magesspan rebelled? Mother, do you even know what happened there?"/p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""Of course I do! The mages who were unhappy with the First Enchanter's decision to remain neutral and not attend the conclave rebelled. What I don't understand is what you were doing getting yourself mixed up in it all."p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Belatedly, Azalea remembered reading something of that sort in the letter Vivienne had given her, that the letter had blamed the mages for what had happened as well. She supposed it was no surprise; no mages remained there to tell the truth, they had all either fled all been killed. Of course the Knight Commander would want to paint his templars in the best light even if that meant discrediting all the mages who had lived there with lies. She sighed and stood up straighter.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""No mother," Azalea said. "It was not the mages who started the trouble there. There were a few malcontents, it is true, but nothing more. Nonetheless, that was enough for the Knight Commander to enact the Right of Annulment. He gave the orders for the templars to trap and kill every mage within the circle. No exceptions. Even the youngest of all the children were killed without mercy. If Caleb had of completed his training he would have been forced to participate as well, he would have been forced to kill me. I got this in the fighting," she said waving a hand in front of her face. Her mother had asked how she got it, of course, but Azalea had said only that she got it fleeing the circle. "I was knocked out in the attack and carried away by a friend who managed to escape. Of course I could have returned to Ostwick and to you, but the templars would have counted the bodies, identified them. They would have determined who was not among the dead and used our phylacteries to find us. I could have returned home, but the templars would have found me and their rite would not be considered complete until all the Ostwick mages were killed. They would have demanded Father hand me over. What do you think he would have done? He would have to choose between watching his daughter be killed or his whole family. I know he would have given me over to them and I would not have blamed him but I didn't want to force him to make that decision. So I fled. I went to the conclave in the hopes of being a voice of reason, of bringing peace and ending the fighting between the templars and mages. But I can promise you, it most definitely was not the mages who started that."p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"As Azalea watched, she saw every word she spoke make her mother grow paler and paler until, grasping the couch, she lowered herself down to sit in it. "I didn't know," she said quietly.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Azalea softened at that. She knew that, really, her mother did care about her. They disagreed yes, but only because they had different opinions on what was best for Azalea. Perhaps she had been too hard on her, thrusting all that new information on her at once, but it was the only way she knew how to get through to her. "I know," she said quietly. Abandoning her leathers for now, she crossed the room and sat next to her mother, taking both her hands in hers, noticing for the first time how thin they were, how paper-like her skin had become with age. Her mother was getting older, it made sense that she wanted to see her daughter married as soon as possible. Part of Azalea felt bad for deceiving her as she had, but it was too late to go back on that now. Besides, she knew that, in the short term at least, it was for the best. Dorian was right, her mother would be distracted for a while and would stay away from the Inquisition, and thus protect her.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Her mother took Azalea's left hand and turned it so she could see the mark on the palm. "Is it also true what they say? That Andraste led you out of the Fade? That you're the only survivor?"p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""I am the only survivor within the blast radius. As for Andraste leading me from the fade..." Azalea shook her head. "I don't know. I don't remember what happened. I don't even remember the explosion or anything leading up to it. The last thing I can recall with any clarity was arriving at the conclave. Then nothing until I woke up in prison. But when I found out that this mark, whatever it is, can close the rifts, then I couldn't just do nothing. How could I live with myself if I had? It was hard enough the first time I killed someone," her mother shot a hard look to her at that but Azalea continued as though she hadn't noticed, "I wouldn't be able to handle knowing however many hundreds of people had died because I was too afraid to do what I must."p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Her mother's eyes had returned to the mark on her hand, running a thumb over it, back and forth. "Does it hurt?" she asked, and Azalea could have sworn she had heard some hesitancy in her voice at asking the question.p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"She smiled and answered, "Not so much any more. When the breach first appeared in the sky, yes, more than anything. But now it's closed it doesn't really. I think I'm used to it, barely even notice it any more."p  
>p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Her mother merely nodded to that and after a few seconds let go of her daughter's hand and stood. "Well, I think you have everything well in hand here. I shall go get ready to accompany you to the coast," she said briskly before turning on her heel and leaving the bedroom. Azalea couldn't help but smile to herself. That was as close to an apology from her mother as she had ever gotten.p 


End file.
